MC Paul Barman - Heartfelt Experiment lyrics

[Intro: MC Paul Barman singing] You love my sausage, girl You love to squeeze it Like I do [Someone in background] Rolling! [Intro: MC Paul Barman talking] Yeah It's like a whole bunch of beautiful Slinkies hanging off my head I am so much cuter than that horrible little girl in the Pepsi commercials You know, I was thinking about her I want to destroy her because she's so irritating and you know she's being put in my face and everything on TV Like, have you seen the one with her in KISS makeup? Ugh, it makes me want to chuck her off the stage But then I was thinking… Dude, so many people are thinking that about me You know, those horrible photographs of me aren't my fault The good ones aren't my fault either for that matter But it's like, when you're put out in the world, it's like an, it's like an affront to the audience unless it's just the best ever I mean I am the best ever but sometimes it's not enough [Verse 1: MC Paul Barman] A Byzantine stream of jizz and steam Seems to have caused chaos like A color-deficient kid who finds A box of unlabeled Cray-Pas in kindergarten Am I a flash in the pan slash ash in the sand? Is it half-a**ed or will I laugh last With some cash in my hand? It's a heartfelt experiment They'll say it's art-felt with merriment And also remember with the Beach Boys' use of the Theramin not The typical braggin' stance Actin' all that with the diagonal straps How it puts face in the saggin' pants All you've read are my lyrics Graffiti in Dragonlance – Sorry! The mighty Hercules I'm rockin' Army-Navy What my mommy gave me And tidy Purplese This verse goes out to Hirsch With love for what it's worth And I'll never forget the time Austin got lost in Boston because it rhymed