MC Paul Barman - Chapstick lyrics

I'm hung like an earthworm, balls bluer than Smurf s**m And if I was the President of the U.S I'd be impeached in my first term So first learn my germs burn like the worst perm Plus I'm getting Growing Pains Like Kirk Cameron and Joanna Kerns Yo seriously dude, I'm down for a chatroom cipher I'll hit you off with Wonder Years Like my man Paul Pfeiffer Can you decipher how I'm kinda like MacGuyver? Making a half pipe out of wood, some tires and a lighter I met this girl Gretchen who gave me an erection I learned a lesson and affection when I came in two seconds I saw her at the mall then She was hanging out with her tall friend She acted real awkward so I went to the food court! And then a girl named Samantha, she was a good dancer We went to my bedroom and we watched some Max Headroom When I pulled down my pants, she started to laugh quick Cause she saw that my penis was the size of a chapstick! [SAY WHAT???] She saw that my penis was the size of a chapstick! [OOOOOOOOOH! That's cold.]