Marvin Hamlisch - Hello Twelve, Hello Thirteen, Hello Love lyrics

Mark: Well, I get the feeling most of you always knew what you wanted to do. Me, I didn't. I was just a kid for a while. Oh then one day, well, my father had this fabulous library in the back of the house, and when I was, about eleven, I guess, I found this medical textbook. It had pictures of the male and female anatomy. Well, I thought that was pretty interesting. I use to read that book a lot Zach: Were you interested in medicine? Or were you just into the pictures? Mark: No, I Val: Hello twelve Richie: Hello thirteen Maggie: Hello love Al: Changes, oh! Bebe: Down below Diana: Up above Val: Time to doubt Mike: To break out Richie: It's a mess, Maggie: It's a mess Paul and Judy: Time to grow Maggie and Al: Time to go Connie, Bobby, and Richie: Adolesce All Adolesce Too young to take over Too old to ignore Al: Gee, I'm almost ready All But What For? There's a lot I am not Certain of Hello twelve Hello thirteen Hello love Mark: And from the book I diagnosed my own appendicitis Next day I went to our doctor down the block. Sure enough, acute appendicitis! They rushed me right to the hospital Well, I figured this book Would cover ev'rything The rest of my life And when I was thirteen, I had my firstWet dream. I went right back to the bookMilky discharge, Milky discharge, milky discharge, Gonorrhea! I was in shock, I mean gonorrhea! Before i'd even started. I was terrified. I couldn't tell my mother I had Gonorrhea! So, the book said, drink a lot of water Zach: Is that all the book said? Mark: No, it said take penicillin, strepto-something-or-other, but I couldn't do anything about that unless I told somebody So all I could do was drink the water And I drank like twenty gla**es a day For three weeks. I almost drowned. Finally I went to confession and told the priest that I had gonorrhea! Well , he was in shock too "who have you been with my son?" Nobody. Nobody "then how can you have gonorrhea?" I told him about the book's diagnosis for milky discharge and he set me straight. It's the only time the church ever helped me out. Well, I was Connie Four foot ten! Four foot ten! That's the story of my life I remember when ev'rybody was my size Boy, was that great. But then everybody started moving up and, there I was, stuck at Four foot ten! Four foot ten But I kept hoping and praying I used to hang from a parallel bar by the hour Hoping i'd stretch Just an inch more 'cause I was into dancing then, and I was good. And I wanted so much to grow up to be a prima ballerina. Then I went out forCheerleader! And they told me: 'no dice, you'll get lost on the football field. The pom-poms are bigger than you." I spent my whole childhood waiting to grow Val: Tits! When am I gonna grow tits? Paul Secret, my whole life was a secret Mike: One little fart! And they called my "stinky" for three years. Ah! All Goodbye twelve Goodbye thirteen Hello love Bebe: Robert golet, robert goulet My god, robert goulet! All Oh! Down below Up above Don: Playing doctor with evelyn Richie: I'll show you mine Richie: You show me yours All La la Kristine: Seeing daddy naked! All Time to grow Time to go Sheila: Suprise! Mom and dad were doing it Bobby: I'm gonna be a movie star Connie But you see, the only thing about me that grew was my desire I was never gonna be maria tallchief. I was just This peanut on pointe! That was my whole trip, my size. It still is. God, my last show I was thirty-two and I played a fourteen-year-old brat Zach: Ah hah, the year of the chicken, thirty-two? Richie: Puck-puck-puck-puck, girl! Connie So, I got caught But I don't look it. And I shouldn't knock it ,cause i've always been able to work From the time I was five in "King and I." "king and i." Up 'till now i've never stopped 'cause whatever I am I am Diana: So excited because i'm gonna go to the high school of performing arts! I mean, I was dying to be a serious actress. Anyway , it's the first day of acting cla**, and we're in the auditorium and the teacher, mr. KarpOh, mr. KarpAnyway, he puts us up on the stage with our legs around each other, one in back of the other and he says: "okay. We're going to do improvisations. Now, you're on a bobsled, it's snowing out. And it's cold. Okay. Go!"