Marvin Hamlisch - Dance: Ten; Looks: Three lyrics

Val: ...But after a while I caught on...I mean, I saw what they were hiring! I also swiped my dance card once after an audition, and on a scale of one to ten, they gave me for dance: Ten, for looks: Three! Why? Dance: Ten; Looks: Three And I'm still on unemployment Dancing for my own enjoyment That ain't it, kid! That ain't it, kid! "Dance: Ten, Looks: Three" Is like to die! Left the theatre and Called the doctor For my appointment to buy Tits and a** Bought myself a fancy pair Tightened up the derriere Did the nose with it All that goes with it Tits and a**! Had the bingo-bongos done Suddenly I'm getting Nash'nal tours! Tits and a** won't get you jobs Unless they're yours! Didn't cost a fortune neither Didn't hurt my s** life either! Flat and sa**y I would get the strays and losers Beggars really can't be choosers That ain't it, kid! That ain't it, kid! Fix the cha**is "How do you do!" Life turned into an Endless medley of "Gee, it had to be you." Why? Tits and a**! Where the cupboard once was bare Now you knock and someone's there You have got 'em, hey Top to bottom, hey! It's a gas! Just a dash of silicone Shake your new maracas and your fine! Tits and a** can change your life They sure changed mine! spoken: You're all looking at my tits now, aren't you? Sheila:(spoken) They aren't that big. Val: (spoken) I heard that, you b**h. I didn't want 'em like yours. I wanted them in proportion. Sheila: (spoken) Well, you got what you paid for. Connie: (spoken) I wouldn't mind having just one of yours. Val: (spoken) Well go out and buy 'em Have it all done! Honey, take my word Grab a cab, c'mon See the wizard on Park and Seventy-Third For Tits and a** Orchestra and balcony What they want is what cha see. Keep the best of you Do all the rest of you Pits or cla** I have never seen it fail Debutante or chorus girl or wife Tits and a** Yes, tits and a** Have changed my Life!