Loudon Wainwright Iii - Fear With Flying lyrics

Who's afraid of flying I'm just afraid of crashing That's why my face is whitening And my teeth I'm gnashing Jesus, can you save us I'll become Jehovah's witness The stewardess is smiling But I know she's scared sh**less Who's afraid of dying I'm just afraid of bleeding Tears of fear I'm crying And my mama I am needing The pilot a**ures us It's merely an airpocket Satan can you save us I've got a soul I'll hock it Don't give me statistics Statistics I'm not buying I'd rather cross the street Newton wasn't lying Strewn along some runway Or squashed against some mountain There are so many other ways I'd rather go and count them