Kevin Bloody Wilson - Living Next Door To Alan lyrics

They came down from Meekatharra In a burned-out blue FJ That farted and just sh** itself in Jutland Parade Right next door to Bondy's When the smoke had cleared a voice said: 'Eh .. this place look all right We'll tell the government it's a sacred site Dead f**in' easy' 'Good day Mr Alan Bond, how you goin' bloke? Hey, I'm your brand-new neighbour ... hey, mate you got a smoke? And I think I'm gonna like it here Livin' next door to Alan' Twenty-four kids, 9 adults and 15 dogs A dead roo on the roof rack and a boot load full of grog 'And I'm flash as Michael Jackson now I'm Livin' next door to Alan' 'The first thing that we gott a do is get another car 'Cause the one sittin' out the front won't even f**in' start We'll call that bloke again from the government He's all right, eh?' So they called the bloke in charge of all the government grants And the next day in the driveway was a new Mercedes Benz 'Eh, come 'n' have a look at this one, Edwin This one's got a wireless ... look at this, eh' 'Good day Mr Alan Bond, how you goin' mate? You got a real flash car, but my one's flash one, eh And I believe that my one's faster than yours, Mr Bond 'Cause mine's a red one' Twenty-four kids, 9 adults and 15 dogs All squeezed in the front seat with the wireless turned full on Listenin' to Slim Dusty now they're Livin' next door to Alan So Bondy called Ben Lexcen and said: 'I want another yacht, twice as big And twice as fast as what I already got That'll f** 'em' So his neighbours called some welfare mob, not to be outdone And got the HMAS Melbourne on some sorta government loan Got me knackered -- they just said they wanted to Go fishin' for yabbies in the river 'Good day Mr Alan Bond, how you goin' mate? You got a real flash boat, but my one's flash one, eh? And I think I'm gonna put him in the river Next door to Alan's Fifteen dogs, 9 adults, two dozen screaming kids With lines strung from the flight deck, tryin' to catch some squid Swimmin', fishin', pissin' in the river Next door to Alan So Bondy threw a party The likes you've never seen And invited everybody from the Premier to the Queen -- And the Leyland Brothers So his neighbours baked bungarra on a barbie on the lawn And invited all their relatives from Meekatharra to come down 'Hey, Edwin, don't you forget to bring a big flagon of woobla There's a party on at my 'ouse!' 'I don't know why he's leavin', or where he's gonna go He says he's got his reasons and I reckon that I know He just never got used to Livin' next door to Abos' 'He's jumpin' up and down and he's makin' such a fuss At least we don't got f**in' coons livin' next door to us! Now we gotta get used to not Livin' next door to Alan Now we gotta get used to not Livin' next door to Alan