Kenneth Koch - Some General Instructions lyrics

Do not bake bread in an oven that is not made of stone Or you risk having imperfect bread. Byron wrote, “The greatest pleasure in life is drinking hock And soda water the morning after, when one has A hangover,” or words to that effect. It is a Pleasure, for me, of the past. I do not drink so much Any more. And when I do, I am not in sufficiently good Shape to enjoy the hock and seltzer in the morning. I am envious of this pleasure as I think of it. Do not You be envious. In fact I cannot tell envy From wish and desire and sharing imperfectly What others have got and not got. But envy is a good word To use, as hate is, and lust, because they make their point In the worst and most direct way, so that as a Result one is able to deal with them and go on one's way. I read Don Juan twenty years ago, and six years later I wrote a poem in emulation of it. I began Searching for another stanza but gave in To the ottava rima after a while, after I'd tried Some practice stanzas in it; it worked so well It was too late to stop, it seemed to me. Do not Be in too much of a hurry to emulate what You admire. Sometimes it may take a number of years Before you are ready, but there it is, building Inside you, a constructing egg. Low-slung Buildings are sometimes dangerous to walk in and Out of. A building should be at least one foot and a half Above one's height, so that if one leaps In surprise or joy or fear, one's head will not be injured. Very high ceilings such as those in Gothic Churches are excellent for giving a spiritual feeling. Low roofs make one feel like a mole in general. But Smallish rooms can be cosy. Many tiny people In a little room make an amusing sight. Large Persons, both male and female, are best seen out of doors. Ships sided against a can*l's side may be touched and Patted, but sleeping animals should not be, for They may bite, in anger and surprise. Of all animals The duck is seventeenth lowliest, the eagle not as high On the list as one would imagine, rating Only ninety-fifth. The elephant is either two or four Depending on the author of the list, and the tiger Is seven. The lion is three or six. Blue is the Favorite color of many people because the sky Is blue and the sea is blue and many people's eyes Are blue, but blue is not popular in those countries Where it is the color of mold. In Spain blue Symbolizes cowardice. In America it symbolizes “Americanness.” The racial mixture in North America should Not be misunderstood. The English came here first, And the Irish and the Germans and the Dutch. There were Some French here also. The Russians, the Jews, and The Blacks came afterwards. The women are only coming now To a new kind of prominence in America, where “Liberation” Is their byword. Giraffes, which people ordinarily Associate with Africa, can be seen in many urban zoos All over the world. They are an adaptable animal, As Greek culture was an adaptable culture. Rome Spread it all over the world. You should know, Before it did, Alexander spread it as well. Read As many books as you can without reading interfering With your time for living. Boxing was formerly illegal In England, and also, I believe, in America. If You feel a law is unjust, you may work to change it. It is not true, as many people say, that That is just the way things are. Or, Those are the rules, Immutably. The rules can be changed, although It may be a slow process. When decorating a window, you Should try to catch the eye of the pa**erby, then Hold it; he'or she should become constantly more Absorbed in what is being seen. Stuffed animal toys should be Fluffy and a pleasure to hold in the hands. They Should not be too resistant, nor should they be made With any poisonous materials. Be careful not to set fire To a friend's house. When covering over A gas stove with paper or inflammable plastic So you can paint the kitchen without injuring the stove, Be sure there is no pilot light, or that it is out. Do not take pills too quickly when you think you have a cold Or other minor ailment, but wait and see if it Goes away by itself, as many processes do Which are really part of something else, not What we suspected. Raphael's art is no longer as popular As it was fifty years ago, but an aura Still hangs about it, partly from its former renown. The numbers seven and eleven are important to remember in dice As are the expressions “hard eight,” “Little Joe,” and “fever,” Which means five. Girls in short skirts when they Kneel to play dice are beautiful, and even if they Are not very rich or good rollers, may be Pleasant as a part of the game. Saint Ursula And her eleven thousand virgins has Recently been discovered to be a printer's mistake; There were only eleven virgins, not eleven thousand. This makes it necessary to append a brief explanation When speaking of Apollinaire's parody Les Onze Mille Verges, which means eleven thousand Male s**ual organs—or sticks, for beating. It is a p**nographic book. Sexual information should be obtained while one is young Enough to enjoy it. To learn of cunnilingus at fifty Argues a wasted life. One may be tempted to Rush out into the streets of Hong Kong or Wherever one is and try to do too much all in one day. Birds should never be chased out of a nature sanctuary And shot. Do not believe the beauty of people's faces Is a sure indication of virtue. The days of Allegory are over. The Days of Irony are here. Irony and Deception. But do not harden your heart. Remain Kind and flexible. Travel a lot. By all means Go to Greece. Meet persons of various social Orders. Morocco should be visited by foot, Siberia by plane. Do not be put off by Thinking of mortality. You live long enough. There Would, if you lived longer, never be any new People. Enjoy the new people you see. Put your hand out And touch that girl's arm. If you are Able to, have children. When taking pills, be sure You know what they are. Avoid cholesterol. In conversation Be understanding and witty, in order that you may give Comfort and excitement at the same time. This is the high road to popularity And social success, but it is also good For your soul and for your sense of yourself. Be supportive of others At the expense of your wit, not otherwise. No Joke is worth hurting someone deeply. Avoid contagious diseases. If you do not have money, you must probably earn some But do it in a way that is pleasant and does Not take too much time. Painting ridiculous pictures Is one good way, and giving lectures about yourself is another. I once had the idea of importing tropical birds From Africa to America, but the test cage of birds All died on the ship, so I was unable to become Rich that way. Another scheme I had was To translate some songs from French into English, but No one wanted to sing them. Living outside Florence In February, March, and April was an excellent idea For me, and may be for you, although I recently revisited The place where I lived, and it is now more “built up”; Still, a little bit further out, it is not, and the fruit trees There seem the most beautiful in the world. Every day A new flower would appear in the garden, or every other day, And I was able to put all this in what I wrote. I let The weather and the landscape be narrative in me. To make money By writing, though, was difficult. So I taught English in a university in spite of my fear that I knew nothing. Do not let your fear of ignorance keep you From teaching, if that would be good for you, nor Should you let your need for success interfere with what you love, In fact, to do. Things have a way of working out Which is nonsensical, and one should try to see How that process works. If you can understand chance, You will be lucky, for luck is what chance is about To become, in a human context, either Good luck or bad. You should visit places that Have a lot of savour for you. You should be glad To be alive. You must try to be as good as you can. I do not know what virtue is in an absolute way, But in the particular it is excellence which does not harm The material but ennobles and refines it. So, honesty Ennobles the heart and harms not the person or the coins He remembers to give back. So, courage ennobles the heart And the bearer's body; and tenderness refines the touch. The problem of being good and also doing what one wishes Is not as difficult as it seems. It is, however, Best to get embarked early on one's dearest desires. Be attentive to your dreams. They are usually about s**, But they deal with other things as well in an indirect fashion And contain information that you should have. You should also read poetry. Do not eat too many bananas. In the springtime, plant. In the autumn, harvest. In the summer and winter, exercise. Do not put Your finger inside a clam shell or It may be snapped off by the living clam. Do not wear a shirt More than two times without sending it to the laundry. Be a bee fancier only if you have a face net. Avoid flies, Hornets, and wasps. Clasp other people's hands firmly When you are introduced to them. Say “I am glad to meet you!” Be able to make a mouth and cheeks like a fish. It Is entertaining. Speaking in accents Can also entertain people. But do not think Mainly of being entertaining. Think of your d**h. Think of the d**h of the fish you just imitated. Be artistic, and be unfamiliar. Think of the blue sky, how artists have Imitated it. Think of your secretest thoughts, How poets have imitated them. Think of what you feel Secretly, and how music has imitated that. Make a moue. Get faucets for every water outlet in your House. You may like to spend some summers on An island. Buy woolen material in Scotland and have The cloth cut in London, lapels made in France. Become religious when you are tired of everything Else. As a little old man or woman, die In a fine and original spirit that is yours alone. When you are dead, waste, and make room for the future. Do not make tea from water which is already boiling. Use the water just as it starts to boil. Otherwise It will not successfully “draw” the tea, or The tea will not successfully “draw” it. Byron Wrote that no man under thirty should ever see An ugly woman, suggesting desire should be so strong It affected the princeliest of senses; and Schopenhauer Suggested the elimination of the human species As the way to escape from the Will, which he saw as a monstrous Demon-like force which destroys us. When Pleasure is mild, you should enjoy it, and When it is violent, permit it, as far as You can, to enjoy you. Pain should be Dealt with as efficiently as possible. To “cure” a dead octopus You hold it by one leg and bang it against a rock. This makes a noise heard all around the harbor, But it is necessary, for otherwise the meat would be too tough. Fowl are best plucked by humans, but machines Are more humanitarian, since extended chicken Plucking is an unpleasant job. Do not eat unwashed beets Or rare pork, nor should you gobble uncooked dough. Fruits, vegetables, and cheese make an excellent diet. You should understand some science. Electricity Is fascinating. Do not be defeated by the Feeling that there is too much for you to know. That Is a myth of the oppressor. You are Capable of understanding life. And it is yours alone And only this time. Women who appeal to you Should be told so, and loved, if you can, but no one Should be able to shake you so much that you wish to Give up. The sensations you feel are caused by outside Phenomena and inside impulses. Whatever you Experience is both “a person out there” and a dream As well as unwashed electrons. It is your task to see this through To a conclusion that makes sense to all concerned And that reflects credit on this poem, your species, and yourself. Now go. You cannot come back until these lessons are learned And you can show that you have learned them for yourself.