[Intro] (I don't think I can find a way to make it on this earth) What’s up family, yeah it's yo cousin Carl man, just given' you a call man. I know you been havin’ a lot on yo mind lately and I know you feel like ya know people ain't been prayin' for you but you have to understand this man, that we are just people. Deuteronomy 28:28 says, "The Lord shall smite thee with madness, and blindness, and astonishment of heart." See family that's why you feel like you feel like you got a chip on your shoulder. Until you finally get the memo, you will always feel that way... [Refrain] Why God, why God do I gotta suffer? Pain in my heart carry burdens full of struggle Why God, why God do I gotta bleed? Every stone thrown at you restin' at my feet Why God, why God do I gotta suffer? Earth is no more, why don't you burn this muf**a? [Reversed Intro] [Verse 1] I beat yo' a**, keep talkin' back I beat yo’ a**, who bought you that? You stole it, I beat yo’ a** if you say that game is broken I beat yo' a** if you jump on my couch I beat yo’ a** if you walk in this house with tears in your eyes Runnin' from poopoo and 'prentice Go back outside, I beat yo' a** lil n***a That homework better be finished, I beat yo’ a** Yo' teachers better not be b**hin' 'bout you in cla** That pizza better not be wasted, you eat it all That TV better not be loud if you got it on Them Jordans better not get dirty when I just bought 'em Better not hear 'bout you humpin' on Keisha's daughter Better not hear you got caught up, I beat yo' a** You better not run to your father, I beat yo' a** You know my patience runnin' thin I got buku payments to make County building's on my a** Tryna take my food stamps away I beat yo' a** if you tell them social workers he live here I beat yo' a** if I beat yo' a** twice and you still here Seven years old, think you run this house by yourself? n***a, you gon' fear me if you don't fear no one else [Chorus] If I can smoke fear away, I roll that motherf**er up And then I take two puffs I'm high now, I'm high now I'm high now, I'm high now Life's a b**h, pull them panties to the side now [Verse 2] (Think I can prolly find a way to make it on this earth) I'll prolly die anonymous I'll prolly die with promises I'll prolly die walkin' back home from the candy house I'll prolly die 'cause these colors are standin' out I'll prolly die because I ain't know Demarcus was snitchin' I'll prolly die at these house parties, f**in' with b**hes I'll prolly die from witnesses leavin' me false accused I'll prolly die from thinkin' that me and your hood was cool Or maybe die from pressin' the line, actin' too extra Or maybe die because these smokers Are more than desperate I'll prolly die from one of these bats and blue badges Body slammed on black and white paint, my bones snappin' Or maybe die from panic or die from bein' too lax Or die from waitin' on it, die 'cause I'm movin' too fast I'll prolly die tryna buy weed at the apartments I'll prolly die tryna diffuse two homies arguin' I'll prolly die 'cause that's what you do when you're 17 All worries in a hurry, I wish I controlled things [Chorus] If I could smoke fear away, I'd roll that mothaf**a up And then I'd take two puffs I've been hungry all my life I'm high now, I'm high now I'm high now, I'm high now Life's a b**h, pull them panties to the side now, now [Verse 3] When I was 27, I grew accustomed to more fear Accumulated 10 times over throughout the years My newfound life made all of me magnified How many accolades do I need to block denial? The shock value of my success put bolts in me All this money, is God playin' a joke on me? Is it for the moment and will he see me as Job? Take it from me and leave me worse than I was before? At 27, my biggest fear was losin' it all Scared to spend money, had me sleepin' from hall to hall Scared to go back to Section 8 with my mama stressin' 30 shows a month and I still won't buy me no Lexus What is an advisor somebody that's holdin' my checks? Just to f** me over and put my finances in debt? I read a case about Rihanna's accountant and wondered How did the bad girl feel when she looked at them numbers? The type of sh**'ll make me flip out And just k** somethin', drill somethin' Get ill and fill ratchets with a lil' somethin' I practiced runnin' from fear, guess I had some good luck At 27 years old, my biggest fear was bein' judged How they look at me reflect on myself, my family, my city What they say 'bout me reveal If my reputation would miss me What they see from me Would trickle down generations in time What they hear from me Would make 'em highlight my simplest lines [Verse 4] I'm talkin' fear, fear of losin' creativity I'm talkin' fear, fear of missin' out on you and me I'm talkin' fear, fear of losin' loyalty from pride 'Cause my DNA won't let me involve in the light of God I'm talkin' fear, fear that my humbleness is gone I'm talkin' fear, fear that love ain't livin' here no more I'm talkin' fear, fear that it's wickedness or weakness Fear, whatever it is, both is distinctive Fear, what happens on Earth stays on Earth And I can't take these feelings With me so hopefully they disperse Within fourteen tracks, carried out over wax Searchin' for resolutions until somebody get back Fear, what happens on earth stays on earth And I can't take these feelings with me So hopefully they disperse Within fourteen tracks, carried out over wax Wonderin' if I'm livin' through fear or livin' through rap [Outro] Damn Goddamn you Goddamn me Goddamn us Goddamn we Goddamn us all [Snippet] Verse two says you only have I known of all the families of the earth, therefore I will punish you for all your iniquities. So until we come back to these commandments, until you come back to these commandments, we're gonna be in this place, we're gonna be under this curse. Because he said he's gonna punish us, the so-called Blacks, Hispanics, and Native American Indians, are the true children of Israel. We are the Israelites according to the Bible. The children of Israel, he's gonna punish us for our inequities. For our disobedience because we chose to follow other gods that aren't his son, so the Lord thy God chasten you. So just like your children, your own son, he's gonna chastise you because he loves you. So that's why we get chastised, that's why we're in the position we're in. Until we come back to these laws, statutes and commandments, and do what the Lord said, these curses are gonna be upon us. We're gonna be at a lower state in this life that we live here in today, in the United States of America. I love you, son, and I pray for you. God bless you, shalom