Kamikazi - Lone Soldier lyrics

[Intro: Kym (Spoken)] As always, our session will be recorded So Kyle, for today's session, I'd really like for you to open up to me a little more Maybe dig deeper into some issues that you haven't really been facing During our talks I feel like there's some things that maybe you need to address So Why don't you open up to me? Tell me what's on your mind Let's start with your childhood [Verse 1: Kamikazi] That's all I really do is open up Put the pen to the pad, let it soak it up When I think about my dad, kinda chokes me up And all the sh** I never had got me broken up And all I really wanted was some clothes and stuff Used to hover by the oven, it was cold as f** Hella hoes, or s*uts I blamed momma cuz she chose the d** Yet I really wasn't old enough But still holdin' up (Do you feel like you hold a grudge?) Only cuz I never felt the love And everything I ever cared about Or when in doubt (either leaves or retreats ) just left me numb I'm sick of talkin' 'bout it, let's be done It's been a long road, sweatin' blood I shed my tears with the best of 'em And I don't wanna take another second stressin' over sh** that was [Hook: Kym] Lone soldier Walkin' this lonely road of lonesome Come from that Broken home (?) Cuz the only life that I know A life without you A life that I knew That life left me Bruised and scarred I need a new start A life that is new [Verse 2: Kamikazi] You know what just k**s me? That my daughter has to feel this pain Her mother ain't sh** But if I speak how I feel my daughter gets b**hy She has so much of a temper but she found her niche She just really needs a fit to release this sh** 13 years old, she don't need this sh** All because her momma wasn't meant to live like this It makes me sick Man I grow just like you If anyone knows the pain I do I feel like we lost our bonds somewhere along this road I've tried to find you It;s like you don't trust me enough to remind you That I've been the one that's been here right beside you I guess I deserve it Maybe I am just as worthless the hate that my mother's confined to (?) to find you I'm not one to hold a grudge But damn, where the f** is the love? Everybody wanna throw me to the mud Maybe it's karma cuz I told my momma I'm done Sits in the dark since they show me no sun I tried to live life though this life mighta won And my daughter don't know what I could've become Or wish I would be if I didn't step up and I pray that they don't [Hook: Kym] [Outro: Kamikazi] I ain't got too many friends And I ain't got too many homies My momma is trippin' I ain't close to anyone unless they still know me So it's me with this pen And this be for my homie Brainsyck the mission I wish upon stars When I (?) and record and mix my emotions And right to the morning Absorb my thoughts Find the source of my orbit to you (?) (?) Without a warning I seem like an orphan Maybe it's me in the storm When angels and demons perform And I could see more within me if there wasn't this fortress stuck in this portrait Oh, but my life is so different I Inherit this thought that I wish to die I am so scared that I pray to God every night "Please disinfect me" I beg the sky Never look through the eyes of an angel Fly by the planets and stars We are the future