Jon Cozart - After Ever After - DISNEY Parody lyrics

[Intro] If you've ever wondered why Disney's tales all end in lies Here's what happened after all their dreams came true [Verse 1 - Ariel] I loved being princess down in this beautiful ocean blue But mermaids are going missing they end up in someone's stew So just try to put yourself in to somebody else's gills You're k**ing my ecosystem with fishing and oil spills (Oh no) Thank you BP, thank you BP The British are k**ing, oil is spilling Now I can't see My eyes! China men feast on Flounder's fins Plus the Japanese k**ed all my whale friends Oceans are browning, I think I'm drowning Thanks to BP You s**! [Verse 2 - Jasmine] Hey, I'm ok, but I'm slightly scared My husband's a mark for the War on Terror Aladdin was taken by the CIA We're not Taliban You've got the wrong man In Guantanamo Bay Prince Ali, where could he be, drowning in wawa Interrogation from the nation of the "free" Bin Laden's taken the fall We're not trained pilots at all Jafar went crazy and no one put up a fuss We're for freedom, Genie can vouch for us Bush was crazy, Obama's lazy, al-Qaeda's not in this country Set free my Prince Ali [Verse 3 - Belle] A who*e! A who*e! A who*e, a who*e, a who*e! This town's gone wild since I married Adam They think I'm going straight to hell (She'll burn, in hell) But the charges laid on me Of bestiality Could wind up getting me thrown in a cell (She is a witch) No, I'm overrun by mad men (We're all crazy) I hear they plan to burn me at the stake (The witch will fry that Belle must die) They legit believe I'm Satan And now I hear that PETA's gonna take my beast away [Verse 4 - Pocahontas] After John Smith traveled back to England I helped my people cultivate the fields More English, French, and Spaniards came to visit And they greeted us with guns and germs and steel They forced us into unknown lands of exile They pillaged, raped, and left us all for dead So now I'm far more liberal with a weapon When I separate their bodies from their heads (Wait what?) Have you ever held the entrails of an English guy? (We're dead) Or bit the beating hearts of Spanish men? Can you shoot an arrow in some French guy's eyeball? (Sacrebleu) Can you paint with the red colors in these men (Adios amigos) I can murder if I please Cause I'm dying of disease I can paint with the red colors in these men [Outro] Thanks to BP Where's Prince Ali? Bestiality I've got STDs