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Tonight I'm an alley-cat, yeah More afraid of you than you are of me But if you leave some food out on the porch I might stay 'till there's nothing left to eat I'd be sitting alone at a lunch table in high school If I wasn't sitting alone at a punk show in Asheville A-hey, hey, hey Tonight the upper left hand side of my chest has a hole as big as the one in my pockets I might've kissed you wearing a bulletproof vest But hell, you kiss like a rocket I'd be a teenage virgin, jerking off in my bedroom If I wasn't a twenty-year old virgin that doesn't have a bedroom Hey, hey, hey