Joe Scudda - Door To My Life lyrics

[Verse One] I used to drown away in liquor, any kind No occa**ions, I got bent any time Sleep all day, be up all night I convinced myself that everything was alright When it really won't You know it's wrong but you really don't Started feeling like, I ain't sh** It started after my job that I ain't quit Said I'd get another one so I ain't trip Now it turn into six months Everyday burning six blunts And I ain't even wrote six rhymes I used to front all the time like "sh**'s fine" I wouldn't show my feelings I said them sh**'s mine And I won't put 'em on another man Said I can do it by myself and I don't need another hand Play the cards I'm dealt, always kept an ace Seldom smile, kid kept a poker face Used to being alone Back and forth so much, the jump out started being my home Two quarters on the corner started being my phone Hope somebody picks me up before I'm already gone [Hook] Open the door to my life Do you like what you see? Is it what you thought it would be? This is all I've got to give Open the door to my life Do you like what you see? Is it what you thought it would be? Let me be, just let me live my life [Verse Two] Now I'm feeling like a dummy Hungry Yo, I'm sick of eating food bought by other people money Sick of getting things just to have 'em get took from me Open the door to my life, sh** ain't all funny sh** ain't all good Think if we can change our past Truthfully I bet we all would, but we can't So I don't think if we could The stubbornness in my life won't let me think if I should That's why I smoke mad C.I.'s Told moms I would quit Couldn't do it in three tries I'm going through things, just like you My pops need a new heart, I'm just like John Q So imagine how I feel Dad disabled, moms a teacher And I'm too broke to pay a f**ing bill Man I'm feeling worthless Plus these dreams of rapping conflict me in this nine to five work sh** Why's life like this for? Why did God put this stress in my life and made me write this for? Pain cuts a little deeper than a knife Open your eyes youngin Look deeper into my life [Hook] [Verse Three] Now when I left home, no hugs and goodbyes No tears in they eyes, and what a surprise Nobody said "Joe, let me help you move in." Cause honestly, I ain't know where I was moving Hope I wouldn't see dudes that I went to school with I cut off all girls I used to fool with Thinking, don't let cats know that I was doing bad Still stuck off the memories of things I used to have Like the clothes, the hoes, the cash Looking at old pictures, thinking like, "Damn I had a blast" I loved them times, wish they would never pa** But I'm stuck in one spot, headed nowhere fast Tough times but you know what life's about Peace to Kayon and Blue for letting me crash on the couch MCNI for holding down the house Open the door to my life...it's coming out [Hook]