This is what you give me to work with Well, honey, I've seen worse We're going to turn this sow's ear Into a silk purse We'll have you washed and dried Primped and polished till you glow with pride Trust my recipe for instant bride You'll bring honor to us all Wait and see, when we're through Boys will gladly go to war for you With great fortune and a great hairdo You'll bring honor to us all A girl can bring her family Great honor in one way By striking a good match And this could be that day Men want girls with good taste Calm, obedient, who work fast paced With good breeding and a tiny waist You'll bring honor to us all We all must serve our Emperor Who guards us from the Huns A man by bearing arms A girl by bearing sons When we're through, you can't fail Like a lotus blossom soft and pale How could any fellow say "No sale" You'll bring honor to us all There, you're ready Not yet An apple for serenity A pendant for balance Beads of jade for beauty You must proudly show it Now add a cricket, just for luck And even you can't blow it Ancestors, hear my plea Help me not to make a fool of me And to not uproot my family tree Keep my father standing tall Scarier than the undertaker We are meeting a matchmaker Destiny, guard our girls And our future as it fast unfurls Please look kindly on these cultured pearls Each a perfect porcelain doll Please, bring honor to us Please, bring honor to us Please, bring honor to us Please, bring honor to us Please, bring honor to us all