No one makes soup like my Grandpa's, with its diced carrots the perfect size and its diced potatoes the perfect size and its wee soft bits – what are their names? and its big bit of hough, which ryhmes with loch, floating like a rich island in the middle of the soup sea. I say, Grandpa, Grandpa your soup is the best soup in the whole world. And Grandpa says, Och, which rhymes with hough and loch, Och, Don't be daft, because he's shy about his soup, my Grandpa. He knows I will grow up and pine for it. I will fall ill and desperately need it. I will long for it my whole life after he is gone. Every soup will become sad and wrong after he is gone. He knows when I'm older I will avoid soup altogether. Oh Grandpa, Grandpa, why is your soup so glorious? I say tucking into my fourth bowl in a day. Barley! That's the name of the wee soft bits. Barley.