J Dilla - Tiny Apartment lyrics

[Verse 1] I'm living in this tiny f**ing apartment Surprised I haven't gone completely insane Isolated, like I was living in Platos cave But I'm the one who put myself in these chains Staring at the walls as the shadows dance mocking me Swear to f**ing god they're slowing closing on top of me Suffocating, how long before they swallow me up? Why am I wallowing like scum? Fat trash stacks piled on my bench often Leaning tower of pizza boxes Grimy as a gooch, swimming in my own filth Blinds shut all the time so I can live nude Beard scruffy, ungroomed, wild on my face Down under, my pubes, look kinda the same Nails rough, uncut, gunked with junk Done nothing productive in months Hit up p**nhub every single day Clicking play, drifting away Jerk off in bed sheets, never wash the sh** Sleeping within stains of my own frickin' jizz I'm a f**ing piece of sh** But I think I love this life I live Maybe, I don't know, cause even I didn't I'd be too stubborn to admit it, too lazy to change Ooh baby I'm lame, who made me this way? Got no one to blame so I guess it's on me Man what can I say, probably always be this way This is me I do wish that I wasn't a virgin But I'm not too concerned with tryna get a girlfriend At least that's what I try to convince myself Cause I've never felt love or the touch of someone else The only food I eat is take away And other sh** that can be microwaved I stay awake all night, no reason why k**ing myself, feeling dead inside Shots of pain rush through my eyes Used to it now I can push through the grind Still I'm sure the sh**'s shortening my life Not great for a guy who's so afraid to die So afraid to die And if I went today would I be proud of this life? Hairy big man, heavy breathing, always eating Barely sleeping, steady beating my dick Woah, there goes another weekend Cycle restarts, repeat it all again, damn I'm trying to look past it But I'm dying in this tiny f**ing apartment