Irish Moutarde - A Lad and a Hag lyrics

One day, feeling quite alone Wishing for a la** fair and gay I met an ugly crone Slowly comin' my way Her hair was long and white And her shoulders were all bent She was such a pitiful sight Mumbling to herself as she went I said : « oh my good lad, Will you give me a kiss? A groom like you I once had And love I sorely miss. » « If you kiss me, » I further said, « I will change into a la** With a fair and pretty head And a mouth-drooling little a**.» I thought I had nothing to lose To find out if her words were true And not some sick devious ruse But there's one thing I had to do Daunted by this grim enterprise And dizzy with her reek I held my breath and closed my eyes And quickly kissed her on the cheek Where the hag stood moments ago Now was a girl young and fair Her limbs were white as snow And shining like gold was her hair Very soon we were groom and bride And we were giddy with delight Of having my love by my side Every day, and every night But soon she showed her black heart Always ordering me around Keeping me and my friends apart Growling at me like a bloodhound One day I was fed up And at last I walked out the door And since then raised a lonely cup For I had no friends anymore Leaving her, I did not regret For her breasts had begun to sag I wish I fled the day I met Long ago that crazy old hag One day, feeling quite alone Wishing for a la** fair and gay A young lad met an ugly crone Slowly coming his way...