Intuition & Equalibrum - Ruins lyrics

[Verse 1] Last thing you said was you hate me But you still held me for safety You pushed me out of your apartment as the tears in your face stream Down your powdered cheek until they formed in a lake We been tryin' to orbit the space We made out of lonely and lazy The cuddles lead to comfort Comfort leads to complacence Cause while the other is leaving We know that one is stuck staying Patiently waiting for nay-thing Cause nothing is changing Except the days in the week and f**ing you leads to frustration I just couldn't take it How you were paid to be naked And that caused me to be distantness This frail ego was shaken You know that I loves you But was too selfish to say it So whatever you felt for me failed to fester hatred And I was too late and I feel ashamed that I wasted A perfect chance to be an honest man who lives for his lady I might have a problem, think I'm addicted to chasing Because as soon as it's easy I leave without even waving Yeah, and turn a maid into a mistress Why do damaged goods attract like two negatives will fix it? Pistol whip the pa**ion to a sedative submission You said that I'm a ba*tard and I bet that is a symptom I was wrong, so this my half-a** apology For every time I didn't hold your hand outside for all to see Every time I let you in my bed when you were calling me After we'd established you'd never get what you want from me A self-centered, selfish son of a b**h Cause' he doesn't deal with feelings and keeps running from sh** I openly think I'm stuck and ain't got nothing to give So I never thought I'd see you past a couple of trisps But who know? Guess that's a pattern I'm apart of How every girl I met that ever mattered had start up I push away until you leave me and I'm hard up Then run back and say I miss you, convince you I'll give my heart up All I leave is, All I leave is, All I leave is All I leave is ruins All I leave is ruins Everytime I do it