Big Ted's dead, he was a great old pig He'd eat most anything, never wore a wig Now he's gone like snow on the water, goodbye He was getting old so the farmer said "Sold him to the butcher just to make a little bread" He's gone like snow on the water, don't cry Ted may be a moo cow next time around Giving sweet milk to the people in the town He'll be whatever, he will choose on air or sea or ground Sows are busy with the piglets fine I'd put them in the forest now if they were mine 'Cause I know they like acorns, I don't like bacon Boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy Boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy Squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly Boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy Sham sham sharoo, oh, sham sham sharoo, Big Ted's sold and gone He came into the kitchen while we were away He took all the rice and he forgot to pay He's gone like snow on the water, goodbye He never cared to do the boogaloo dance All he ever thought about was food and romance And he's gone like snow on the water, goodbye Ted may be a moo cow next time around Giving sweet milk to the people in the town He'll be whatever he will choose on air or sea or ground The sows are busy with the piglets fine I'd put them in the forest now if they were mine 'Cause I know they like acorns and I don't like bacon Boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy Boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy Squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly Boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy Sham sham sharoo, oh, sham sham sharoo, Big Ted's sold and gone Sham sham sharoo, oh, sham sham sharoo, Big Ted's sold and gone Boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy Boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy Squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly, squidly Boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy, boochy Sham sham sharoo, sham sham sharoo, Big Ted's sold and gone