Heart of Illinois, Heart of Illinois, Heart of Illinois, Don't it make ya sick? Heart of Illinois, Heart of Illinois, Heart of Illinois, Shut up ya f**ing' dick! Ten f**ing years I've lived in this town There's never nothing happening going on Except fairs, and baseball, and sidewalk sales, and old people f**ing with their lawns! Farm Futures! Soybeans and corn! Parks and recreation! Collecting doorknobs?!? Pride of the Prairie, Pride of the Prairie, Pride of the Prairie... Don't it make ya retch? Pride of the Prairie, Pride of the Prairie, Pride of the Prairie, Shut up ya f**in' wrench! Twenty f**ing years Ive lived in this town Nothing's never going on around here Except unemployment, and gangs, and skating bands, and college students slamming f**ing beers!!!