I don't wanna leave, Bernadette But I don't wanna live with the jet set I don't wanna leave with you payin' all my debts With that alimony, palimony, whatever it is you get Ooh, Bernadette, you are so expensive You've never done a day's work in your life You've got no incentive You've made a career out of punting off all of the men you've slept with Ooh, Bernadette, you are so expensive I can't get a job, Bernadette So all that I can offer are a lot of bad debts If you marry me, Bernadette You'll lose the alimony, palimony, whatever it is you get Ooh, Bernadette, you are so expensive You've never done a day's work in your life You've got no incentive You've made a career out of punting off all of the men you've slept with Ooh, Bernadette, you are so expensive Ooh, Bernadette, Bernadette Ooh, Bernadette, Bernadette (Bernadette's got a house in the country She's really got it made Her lawyers made her filthy rich She's got all expenses paid.) Maybe a famous rock star will fly you away Then you'll eat him all up And spit him out With a dash of Perrier And when you've had enough You'll throw him away And take him for all you can get Yeah, you like it don't you, Bernadette? I don't want to leave Bernadette But I wanna keep a little bit of self respect I don't want to leave with you paying all my debts With that alimony, palimony, whatever it is you get Ooh, Bernadette, you are so expensive You've never done a day's work in your life You've got no incentive Women like you oughta be locked up For giving others a bad name Ohh, Bernadette, you are so expensive Ooh, Bernadette, Bernadette Ooh, Bernadette I think you're sad