(Ooh ah ah ah) Dracula was the name And The Boogie Man is my fame I've got a monster in my closet Someone's underneath my bed The wind's knocking at my window I'd k** it but it's already dead It waits 'til the midnight hour to come To torture me for the wrong I've done It just sits there and stares at me And it won't let me get any sleep I've got a monster in my closet Someone's underneath my bed The wind's knocking at my window I'd k** it but it's already dead At first I was scared when I looked at his eyes But now that I know him I'm not that surprised I'm just waiting on the sun to rise Oh how I wish that old sun would rise I've got a monster in my closet Someone's underneath my bed The wind's knocking at my window I'd k** it but it's already dead I used to wonder why he looked familiar Then I realized it was a mirror Oh and now it is plain to see The whole time the monster was me Oh there's a monster in my closet Someone's underneath my bed The wind's knocking at my window I'd k** it but it's already dead Yeah, the living dead Only thing that could bring it back alive, woman Is some good good head (Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha)