Garfunkel & Oates - I Would Never (Dissect a Ewe) lyrics

Remember the time we were in Biology cla**? We had to grow a plant to learn photosynthesis Let's do it again! Remember the time we learned CH and HHC- Double OOH were a carbohydrate Dissolves faster than a lipase? 'Cause I really like to learn about science And I think k**ing frogs is fine But my lab teacher crossed the line When he gave us all sheep's eyeballs I would never dissect a ewe Believe me, I'd slice it if I wanted to I'd already would've ripped its face in two But that will never happen Remember the time we saw the nitrogen cycle Study of root nodules and legumes With or without rhizobium? Remember the time we studied h*mologous chromosomes DNA replication, looked at mitosis and meiosis Followed by division of the cytoplasm? 'Cause I really like to learn about science We opened up that pregnant cat And the fetal pig was cooler than that But some things are disgusting I would never dissect a ewe Believe me, I'd incise it if I wanted to I already would've turned its hooves to glue (You would've liked it) But that will never happen No amount of alcohol Would sterilize it all When I was 5 I went to the petting zoo And that sheep face will haunt me (Sheep ghost... sheep ghost will haunt you) 'Cause I would never dissect a ewe Believe me, I'd slice it if I wanted to I already would've punched it and asphyxiated its face with its own intestines and hung it from a basketball hoop to drain it... (Looked at it like I was a girl from the original movie "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" and then threw up because my character just had an abortion) But that will never happen