Futuristic - Fighting With Myself lyrics

[Verse 1 - Futuristic:] Sometimes I wanna lay in bed alone Sometimes I wish that you was in it too Sometimes I wanna hit the studio But then again, I ain't in the freaking mood I tend to push everybody I love away It's like I can only deal with one thing at a time But that f**s me over in a long run Because eventually, I usually change my mind It's time that I made a decision, things is different Closer to my dreams, but I feel like I'm a never get it I've been persistent and gained some wisdom from two way trips And I don't know if I wanna be Zachary or Futuristic All the b**hes predictable and they so persistent Keep you in my vision, to move forward with no commitment I tend to think too much and argue with myself You did your best, for what's worth Leave me alone, you cannot help [Hook - Jerrin Jaramillo:] I keep fighting with myself Leave me alone, no one can help You did your best, for what it's worth I feel so small on this earth [Verse 2 - Futuristic:] Yo, lately my emotions taking over I'm having suicidal thoughts Staring at all these white walls I know it sounds kinda strange But there's pleasure and there's pain Running through my veins Every single time, that I write songs I wanna rip my f**ing hair, up out my skull Reading messages, from labels Then waiting, hoping they might call I pour some poison in the water, out in Hollywood Hoping some of these wack rappers drink the sh** and die, oh That's the least of my concerns, really Cause I turned out to be everything, that I hated most An a**hole with a lot of ho's, that I'm f**ing with But still I keep a chick that's so deep in love that she'll never know I f**ed up and came inside her, I should be a father But I aborted my only child, that I'll never know A lot of secrets I should keep them, but I leak them Cause without honest words I feel like my music ain't gon' never grow [Hook - Jerrin Jaramillo]