Franklin P. Adams - The Ballade Of The Average Reader lyrics

I try to touch the public taste, For thus I earn my daily bread. I try to write what folks will paste In scrap books after I am dead. By Public Craving I am led. (I' sooth, a most despotic leader) Yet, though I write for Tom and Ned, I've never seen an average reader. The Editor is good and chaste, But says: (Above the public's head; This is _too_ good; 'twill go to waste. Write something commonplacer- Ed.) Write for the average reader, fed By pre-digested near-food's feeder, But though my high ideals have fled, I've never _seen_ an average reader. How many lines have been erased! How many fancies have been shed! How many failures might be traced To this-this average-reader dread! I've seen an average single bed; I've seen an average garden-weeder; I've seen an average cotton thread- I've _never_ seen an average _reader_. L'ENVOI Most read of readers, if you've read The works of any old succeeder, You know that he, too, must have said: 'I've never seen an Average Reader.'