Franklin P. Adams - If the Advertising Man Had Been Gilbert lyrics

Never mind the slippery wet street-- The tire with a thousand claws will hold you. Stop as quickly as you will-- Those thousand claws grip the road like a vise. Turn as sharply as you will-- Those thousand claws take a steel-prong grip on the road to prevent a side skid. You're safe--safer than anything else will make you-- Safe as you would be on a perfectly dry street. And those thousand claws are mileage insurance too. --From the Lancaster Tire and Rubber Company's advertisement in the Saturday Evening Post Never mind if you find it wet upon the street and slippery; Never bother if the street is full of ooze; Do not fret that you'll upset, that you will spoil your summer frippery, You may turn about as sharply as you choose. For those myriad claws will grip the road and keep the car from skidding, And your steering gear will hold it fast and true; Every atom of the car will be responsive to your bidding, AND those thousand claws are mileage insurance too-- Oh, indubitably, Those thousand claws are mileage insurance too.