Flying Lemming - Election Special lyrics

“Thank you all so much for your warm applause I promise you that I am a very worthy cause I stand here proud, asking for your vote today As we get the election process well underway My policies will make life be as easy as it should I cant say what they are, but I promise that they're good And I will cut pollution with no money being spent And lower tax and raise income and make all crooks repent Answers to all life's problems are resting in my head What they are I can't say so I'll attack my opponent instead I refuse to do mud slinging, or to try to cause a smear Although I could tell you things he wont want you to hear Like his finances, notice he has a bigger house And more holidays, and a job there for his spouse Doesn't his car look new, cant have had that long Makes you kind of wonder where the party funds have gone But I wont stoop to his level, I'm too refined for that Not even to mention he's looking well fed and fat So here I am before you, trying hard to impress Or trying to be the guy that you dislike less And as I've made my standing clear, you must now agree Your only sensible option is to vote for me” “Now here's our next candidate, I'm sure that you all know him” (continue this by going back to the first line of the poem)