(Note: this segment is spoken. The five of them describe each other.) Jon: One of us was a U.S. Army MP. Jimmy: One of us came out of the closet at thirty-seven. Cliff: One of us went to his high school prom, but with his boyfriend. Aurelio: One of us was a high school cross-country champion. Michael: And one of us WAS a high school cross-dresser, and it WASN'T ME. Jon: One of us coached high school wrestling. Jimmy: As teenagers, two of us attempted suicide. Cliff: All except one of us are single, and available! Michael: And bitter... and desperate! Jon: I only date pro-feminist men, so it kinda, you know, narrows it down. Michael: That's why you're so lonely! Jon: I know! Jimmy: One of us believes that size matters. Jon: And four of them are LYING. Aurelio: One of us ran away from home at the age of fourteen. Cliff: Two of us have been repeatedly arrested for civil disobedience. Aurelio: One of us had a former girlfriend who died of AIDS as the result of a blood transfusion. Michael: One of us is a survivor of childhood s**ual abuse. Jon: One of us was f*g-bashed with a two-by-four. Jimmy: One of us has been living with AIDS for ten years. Michael: And he's TIRED of it!