Example - You can't rap - new version lyrics

You can't rap my friend you're white and you're from Fulham Please put down the mic there's no way you can fool them Don't be stupid you won't get that far Turn your back on Hip Hop bruv and go and play guitar Of all the possibilities I ever coulda chosen Supposing career wise I'd picked hip hop Imagine all the tip top rappers' bottom lips drop Sittin there shocked that some other bloody sh** hot Dude with a mullet, bussin shorts wearing flip flops Is spittin to a gathering lookin like a criss cross Of fans lovin Prodigy, Kylie and Slipknot Nearly coulda happened bruv, look at me I sh** not Little Elliot, rhymes for the hell-of-it If only he was ghetto mans maybe we would sell-a-bit I tried hard to dig up the credentials Even thought about putting gold in my dentals An Anglo-Saxon with a broken accent But rapper's from Fulham get a strange reaction So I said bye to rap, saw the issue at hand Some guitar lessons later, formed my own band Attention Seeking - how far should a man go? Cut his ear off like Vincent Van Gogh? Dash cash to the crowd so the venue scrambles Turn my good life into a Babyshambles? f** myself up real properly, like Pete Doherty Cover of Heat I'm hot property Everybody's clockin' me I own the crowd Now I gotta link me up with a Girls Aloud Next exchange vows now my pops is proud There's a nine on my cloud I'm as pleased - As I ever been bro, mans flash like Jose Mourinho Women crave me like bottles of Pinot Now I've got big I can fight photographers Bang the obvious, please biographers Spend currency til there ain't none left And when I need more I'll fake my own d**h Right now it's just hit and miss, soon I'll taste a bit of bliss Bangin chicks at worst with looks like Jayne Middlemiss Never doin' hideous, it's too bad for busi-ness I spin when they grin with skin like Darth Sidious Never out-riddle this, you're all chattin gibberish Verbal Diarrhoea so you're never getting rid of this I hear your retorts there's All Sorts like liquorice I can sense your bitterness, you wishin' you written this