[hook] Six cups of NeoCitran and I feel no pain Sitting on the back porch outside in the cold rain Chasing the c**aine walk the streets with no name Look my nose change color like Rudolph I'm no saint No pain no gain, told you I'm no angel No rainbows or hallows just lightning inhale boy How could I fail boy just tap me up another rail boy [Verse 1] We don't ever do white with my shades on When the sun is too bright I got devious plans to introduce tonight So good at being bad I could never do right When I was younger I had to go on special meds In highschool the teachers put me in special ed And kids made fun of me and my temple went bad Once smashed a kids skull until his head bled All over the dez they put me under arrest But the charges couldn't be pressed too young I guess Doctor said I was depressed so more meds were suggested Never in my life have I ever been accepted Not even now you would have thought I had a greater life Lots of friends, popularity, a smile on my face But I'm still ducking the hate I'll cover in scrapes Still trudging through the mud f**ing stuck in this place [hook] [Verse 2] I always knew I was a little bit off, a little bit lost But always knew I could do whatever I wanted I always knew I was just a little bit haunted On the playground I was haunted, anxiety problems And the kids call me more names and cause me more pain And every year that went by became more strange Started braking into houses, wasn't playing board games And all of a sudden one day the door rang It was one of the kids I ran with Then he had a gun he pointed at my mom and said 'this is for your son, if he tells the cops what happened then he's gonna get what's comin' My mom was so scared she was sick to her stomach Causing so much grief at all night I would spend Those kids were just using me they weren't really my friends I thought I was being cool, gangster like them Guess I didn't know who I was I was trying to pretend [hook]