Emily Skeggs - "Thanks for the Care Package..." lyrics

[MEDIUM ALISON] Dear Mom and Dad Thanks for the care package I was running out of granola bars so it came just in the nick of time They sell a kind here I swear is made of paste Nothing else worth writing home about Har-Har Al I could draw you some posters [JOAN] Nah, we need them tomorrow night [MEDIUM ALISON] I could do it right now [JOAN] Really? [MEDIUM ALLISON] Yeah, just some simple drawing, right? Sure So, you want them to say? [JOAN] We just need some really good "No Nukes" posters [MEDIUM ALISON] Right Okay So I was thinking...maybe...maybe something like... [JOAN] Oh. That's funny That's really good [MEDIUM ALISON] This? No, this is just quick and stupid... [JOAN] Who's this? In the photo? [MEDIUM ALISON] My dad [JOAN] That's your dad? [MEDIUM ALISON] Yeah! [JOAN] He looks cool Did he teach you how to draw cartoons? [MEDIUM ALISON] Oo, definitely not [JOAN] Why's that funny? [MEDIUM ALISON] Oh, it's not funny, he's just more, uh, refined? [JOAN] I think it's amazing he's cool with you being a dyke [MEDIUM ALISON] What? Could we talk about something else? [JOAN] Sure Why? [MEDIUM ALISON] Because I don't know how my parents feel about... I just figured it out myself [JOAN] Oh [MEDIUM ALISON] About two weeks ago... [JOAN] Huh, with who? [MEDIUM ALISON] "With who" what? [JOAN] Who were you with? [MEDIUM ALISON] Oh, nobody... Nobody! Oh my God. I'm so embarra**ed I was in a bookstore... [JOAN] In a bookstore? Nice! [MEDIUM ALISON] What? No! Two weeks ago I was downtown. I just wandered into the bookstore. I was just browsing, and I picked up this book [JOAN] Oh- word is out [MEDIUM ALISON] I was like, "oh interviews, this looks interesting" then I was like "these people are all..uh..." [JOAN] Gay? [MEDIUM ALISON] Yes, gay And then I was like "Oh my God. I'm [JOAN] A lesbian." A dyke --Yes, a dyke. Yes And I totally flipped out and shoved the book back on the shelf and then I left But then I came the next day and bought the book, and then I came back the next day and bought all the other books in that section and then I made myself go to the meeting at the Gay Union, and then, uh well...and then... it's now Hi [JOAN] Hello That's a powerful book [MEDIUM ALISON] It is [JOAN] So I should probably go [MEDIUM ALISON] Okay [JOAN] Will I see you at the union meeting tomorrow afternoon? [MEDIUM ALISON] Uh, yeah. I'll be at the meeting I'll bring those posters. Finish them up [JOAN] Cool See you then Bye, Alison [MEDIUM ALISON] Bye, Joan