To keep the rudder steady To keep the ocean calm Forget that hot & heavy Keep it real lukewarm You must prevent the eye from blinking Best to keep it shut & to keep your hand from wandering Use it to cover that eye up If it's dark as d**h in there try not to mind Consider yourself blessed you're only playing blind To keep out creepy noises In the middle of the night Eat a hundred sandwiches In loud & crunchy bites While your gut's digesting While you chew Are a hundred little tiny teeth Having their way with you And all you can do, all you do is watch & wait Don't suffer much more than a weak malaise Keep those critters happy Pretend that you don't see Hold your arm out make a fist & just let them feed & to keep out paranoia At least a bottle or more When they're gone stuff in your notes & throw them overboard