Ella Fitzgerald - To Keep My Love Alive lyrics

I've been married, and married, and often i've sighed "i'm never a bridesmaid, i'm always a bride" I never divorced them, i hadn't the heart Yet remember these sweet words, "'till d**h do us part" I married many men, a ton of them Because i was untrue to none of them Because i bumped off every one of them To keep my love alive Sir paul was frail, he looked a wreck to me At night he was a horse's neck to me So i performed an appendectomy To keep my love alive Sir thomas had insomnia, he couldn't sleep at night I bought a little arsenic, he's sleeping now all right Sir philip played the harp, i cussed the thing I crowned him with his harp to bust the thing And now he plays where harps are just the thing To keep my love alive To keep my love alive (bridge) I thought sir george had possibilities But his flirtations made me ill at ease And when i'm ill at ease, i k** at ease To keep my love alive Sir charles came from a sanitorium And yelled for drinks in my emporium I mixed one drink, he's in memorium To keep my love alive Sir francis was a singing bird, a nightingale, that's why I tossed him off my balcony, to see if he, could fly Sir atherton indulged in fratricide, He k**ed his dad and that was patricide One night i stabbed him by my mattress-side To keep my love alive To keep my love alive To keep my love alive