Dubliners - The Comical Genius lyrics

O a comical genius was thinking one day How he'd jack up his job and receive handy pay He did not like begging and work was too hard So he got a bright notion to join up the guard Diddly-i-dum diidly-i-dum diddly-i-dum dum day Well he went up to Dublin, to the depot went in Got a new suit of blue as bright as new pins They drilt him, they drilt him, they drilt him so hard The old sergeant proclaimed him a full fledged guard Diddly-i-dum diidly-i-dum diddly-i-dum dum day He was stationed somewhere near the town of Athy On the roads of the district he kept a close eye The girls they admired him as all bra**ers do Fell in love with the guard and his new suit of blue Diddly-i-dum diidly-i-dum diddly-i-dum dum day Well the girls they would wink and they'd nod as he pa**ed O but this city guard had his eye on one la** And this little colleen, she being a die-hard She made it quite clear that she wanted no guard Diddly-i-dum diidly-i-dum diddly-i-dum dum day Well one time while on duty on a cold winter's night Sure he caught her out cycling without any light Where's your light, miss? Says he; for an answer says she It's next to me liver, where you'll never be Diddly-i-dum diidly-i-dum diddly-i-dum dum day