.... Calling all Americans of above-average intelligence... College graduates, apply today... Come decimate dictatorships and overthrow regimes In exotic far-off places the vacation of your dreams You'll a**emble puppet governments and play the hand of God We're an equal-opportunity crime fighting squad [Chorus] Citizen C.I.A. Citizen C.I.A. Now I've trained an army for my kids to fight one day We'll teach them all of our secrets and then we'll walk away We're knee-deep in guerillas, yeah the party never stops United States of America undercover cop [Chorus] Five weeks paid vacation and a 401K