Drank-A-Lot - Jack Off lyrics

(Numskull) It's a Friday night, and I ain't got no a** No car, no brew, no get high stash I done watched every movie in the house And my Blockbuster bill is like eighty bucks, so that plan's out I done went through the phone book from front to back From new hoes to three year ago old school rats And I'm banned from all the clubs cuz I don't tip the door n***as Look like, you eatin' three-hundred pound, six four n***as Plus, I don't wear suits to boogie in I wear dope dealer sh**s that I can get some p**y in My n***as is down to ride, but I'm tired of seein' them Swear I need me a muthaf**in' real girlfriend But that's out of the question, cuz I treat 'em like sh** Take they cash, take they car, make 'em f** the whole clique Damn! I realized I'm just burnin' my bridges And my dick feelin' good rubbin' up against my britches [Chorus 2X: Clee] Have you ever had a day you had nothin' you need? No a**, no cash, no drank, and no weed? And all the hoes you could've f**ed you told to back off? It's lookin' like to me it's time to jack off (Numskull) Now that I done let one go, I'm thinkin' "Say now" I can cope with my life bein' dull, boring, and plain now But lately, I find myself beatin' more often If every nut was year off my life, for me it's coffins If it's true what they say, I'm goin' blind right now My palms is growin' hair, I'm thinkin' p**n right now If it was a whole band here, I'd be a horn right now If it's a party over there, I'd be scorin' right now (Clee) See I'm alone in my room, and I'm about to jack off Imaginin' a bad b**h givin' me some good balls See at the present time, I ain't got no a** Wanna get high first, but I got no weed, no hash Strolled to the ATM and said "I'm out of cash!" Then on the way home, I ran out of gas Now I gotta walk 12 blocks, plus it's hot And to make it even worse, a n***a dick on rock [Chorus] (Clee) Finally get back to the house in a broken sweat Turn on the TV, everything provokin' s** I can't believe today, can't believe my luck Can't believe I can't find one hoe to f**! Can't believe I left the house and got stuck Can't believe I can't afford a tow truck And you know what? Waitin' for a b**h I'm goin' loco Don't even know if one comin', I only got a hopeful Time to go ahead and put my first plan in motion Go and get my tie, go and get my lotion Turn on the p**n tape, then I get to strokin' Wish I was the cat, that this b**h was deep throatin' [sound of a lotion dispenser, and groaning] [Chorus]