Doug MacLeod - Dubb's Talking Religion Blues lyrics

I was standing on a Des Moines corner one day When this fella said, “You know what Jesus had to say?” I said, “I'm not sure which Jesus you talking about.” He said, “I'm talking about the one that saved my life.” I said, “You can't mean the Gardner of my ex wife?” He said, “No, I'm talking ‘bout, the only route.” I said, “Look here, what you say?” He said, “I'm talking ‘bout the light and the only way To save your soul from hell and eternal dam-a-nation.” “Are you tellin' me if I don't believe the way you believe That hell is the final resting place for me?” He said, “Yeah.” I said, “I didn't realize I was in that bad of a situation!” He said, “Have you read the bible?” I said, “Not all the way through.” He said, “That's something you oughta' do ‘Cause every word is truth and proven fact.” I said,”You take the bible literally? He thought for a moment, and said, “I do really.” I said, “Well I got a problem concerning that.” “Now you take the book Leviticus Don't you think that some of those things in there are ridiculous? Like you can stone your kid if he talks back to you And if your sideburns get too long They can whup on you cause they know that's wrong You gonna' tell me those are Christian like things to do? Now how about Jonah and the whale? How can you go in the mouth and not come out the tail? That right there has always puzzled me.” He said, “Well you don't need to be puzzled no more It was a miracle that brought Jonah to the shore The whale spit him out and sailed on out to sea.” I said, “What you think about evolution?” He said, “You're talking ‘bout the evil solution We all come from the garden of eden and it's sacred soil.” “Well how you explain carbon dating?” “That's scientific heathen mis-information God worked six days and on the seventh day rested from his toil.” “How you know God's a man? Could be a woman you understand Or a combination of both, what do you think of that?” He laughed and said, “That could never be God's a he and not a she It's written in the Bible and everybody knows thats fact.” “Well I've heard that Bible's been changed Because when you translate words sometimes the meanings ain't the same In fact they even left some of those chapters out And nefarious leaders doing dastardly deeds So what could be maybe ain't what it seems Don't you think to a thinking mind that's got to raise a little doubt?” He said,”My friend you question wrong ‘Cause I'm just here to take you home And brother, I just want to save your soul.” “We became brothers and friends real fast Like two ex wives coming together to kick my... I believe its time for this boy to be told.” CHORUS You preach and you can proselytize Tell me how to live my life And it's all done in your God's name Now me and God we doing alright By the Golden Rule I try to live my life But zealots like you don't feel the same Most Christians I know ain't like you They believe in Jesus and his teachings too But their words heal rather than inflame So somebody get my BB Gun I'm gonna shoot this boy in the bum Because if I shot him in the head, I'd miss his brain “You speak softly but your message is hard Saying your way is the only way to God But I'm here to tell you I don't agree If we're all children of God, we're all brothers How can just your chosen go to heaven and not the others? That kind of thinking just don't sit right with me What about the native Americans walked here first Saw God in the sky, the rivers and the earth You gonna tell me they ain't goin' to heaven? He said, “Nope, they shall be denied Because they did not know of the one crucified.” “That makes as much sense to me as two and two is seven.” “I think Jesus was a great prophet, one of the few Come here to speak a simple truth Like respecting others and living by the golden rule But you don't respect my right to believe The way I hear God speaks to me So the way I see it, there ain't much Christian in what you do Well this is the end of you and me, ‘cause right now I'm gonna' leave Because conversating with you ain't nothing but flawed But there's one thing I want you to know And I'll tell you before I go I believe an honest prayer will find the ear of God.” CHORUS