Don't Flop - Anton Murphy vs Shuffle T lyrics

[Round 1: Shuffle T] First of all, I just want to thank Don't Flop for giving me this enormous star Can I please get your autograph, can you please sign my daughter's bra I can only take this battle so he can finally get to talk at last I love all of your awesome bars that leave your opponents torn in half I just think-oh sorry mate you're not who I thought you are I bet even though it's battle rap that hurts I thought he was Howard Brown from the Halifax accident Now your try out was a sequence of boring, awkward speeches The hardest battle I've ever judged for all the wrong reasons What a f**ing beg He has beg on toast for begfast and he begs for dinners He only goes to church so he can beg forgiveness He sits outside of a Tescos then he begs for liquor You can tell him he's a begger I bet he'll beg to differ Now let me put this into a language you know, dramatically slow You're bad cause you're actually a practical joke Everyone here is effectively pranking your phone And you're too f**ing stupid to hang up and go But you called me out cause you hate me But me and Marlo refreshed the scene Don't get me wrong I'm not saying we're the best the league has ever seen But at the very least we made your weak bars seem extra weak So don't you dare come today and labor any scheme About football, hockey or table tennis teams Football schemes have been done! f** sake You reuse old lines in the worst way That makes you out to be a f**ing bird brain Oh, one second {answer phone} Hello? Yeah it's Eur' mate from Don't Flop's 1st Birthday Turns out they want back all of the wordplay Reusing old lines is so stupid it hurts He doesn't seem to care if somebody was using them first He said, "I've just written a song for something new in the works." He started doing a verse and I knew all the words I'd start calling you a c*nt but you're the sort of c*nt That when you're calling him a c*nt, he's like, "Yeah I'm a c*nt" It's like, "No, you're a f**ing c*nt." Just to reiterate; you are a f**ing c*nt You attention seeking, pathetic and did I mention, you're a f**ing c*nt? f** your claim to fame, b**h it's over, Big Brother's done You've had your 15 minutes and you don't get another one [Round 2: Shuffle T] When people say I k** it they mean that I have been a threat When people say you k** it they mean the vibe of the event Like when this battle was confirmed, you should've seen what this clever f**ing tweeted "The rest is up to God", you f** nob, you think He'd ever come between us? Like he's going to come to a rap battle, in Brixton, and let the f**ing second coming great us Do you believe whatever stuff the priest says Were you told by a vicker that if you could have s** and s** his penis you'd get extra hugs from Jesus? Oh yeah, God's up there now going, "Hmmm, there's that Syrian war I should really handle Where ah kids get hit with bits of shrapnel But first I better visit Bagnal to make Anton Murphy win a battle C'mon Jesus let's hit the chapel!" It's straight pathetic, you crave attention like David Brenton in that training session This goes to all try outs, pay attention Wait a second and play defenses Don't Flop stage is set but you make an effort before you make an entrance Coming into the league guns blazing every where statements sent About taking heads won't get you fame, respect or pay your debts So go and make your threats But it's safe to reckon for you the game is ending For trying to f** with Posh like David Beckham And why are you always going about going to a top university like that's important sh**? You're privately educated, of course you did Oh, what? You didn't know? Yeah his mum paid for him to go to private school Just check is Big Brother admission tape he admits it straight That's why none of your insults about cla** can intimidate It's ironic I was state educated and my cla** is in the middle range But when I learned how to finger paint you learned how to figure skate No really mate, it's pirouette and figure eights are frigging great Back at lunch he'd hang with the pope and sit and wait And if his salad and roasted chicken steaks are a matter of only minutes late He's angrily throwing dinner plates School trips away to all 50 states, a fricking slave to Christmas Day You're so posh you finished everything you say with "sil-vous-plait" But I thought he's from the streets, that's what got his presence so large Well fine I'm from Berkshire, b**h that's why I go hard Yeah, you might not expect it but I've seen some things in those parts Last December I was just walking through an old park I look over to see an man going through a lone path Out in the cold dark and he was wearing no scarf Well I've been pretty tough so far But that's some crap I've had to live with The house that I grew up in only ever had six rooms Having a tiny house put the butler in the a big mood So every now and then he would serve us really sh** food Like fish stew You see he wants us segregated, but that's not what Don't Flop is Separated, but if you want us locked in boxes I've got the lock pick See when I drop this hot sh** it'll make Locksmyth Drop as fast as a John Smith thought quicker than a hot chip, obnoxious I'm my most prop sh** if he got pissed Watch my dogs rip your fox quick I'll Clock Orange you to repeated watch Grist in a mosh pit Of 14 year old fanboys posh kids Just to reiterate, you are a f**ing c*nt Your tension is weak and pathetic and did I mention you're a f**ing c*nt? You're a f**ing c*nt, you're f**ing c*nt, you're a f**ing c*nt, you're a f**ing c*nt Die, die, die, die, die, die you f**ing c*nt [Round 3: Shuffle T] Thanks for the free tea I needed some PG's People been calling this a grudge match, this isn't a grudge match This is a 15 minuter trying to make his come back of something that he s**s at Motherf**ing thug rap You ain't got the will from hubcaps to dust flaps to mud caps Bruv that's stuff that you just lack So f** that and f** anyone saying that this guy's harder I'm smarter, my mind's sharper than the top of a trident You can't conquer Poseidon or topple the giant I've got the knowledge of Mayans scholars and writers on the horizon The philosopher's mind and a doctor of science I'm Thomas Aquinas with God on my side like Protestant choirs Saying this was a good match up is a horrible lie I only took this battle cause it was comically timed The hatred that I have for you is not a disguise I'm disgusted to say that you even share this hobby of mine You hungry for fame and over confident brick Prick Honestly brother if all you want to do is get big Then go hop in a whip and drive it off of a cliff Think about it, there's pros and cons to the sh** Like you won't probably live but it's a great way to make some Twitter follower's click And for us, you dying is a f**ing positive thing Thought his try out is a cla**ic, but it wasn't the script of Gone With The Wind The only reason he didn't temple tap is because he's a dick and he'd probably miss Dreams of being a celebrity, head shoved up his a** Dreams of being a successfully newly discovered star Well you won't make that stage off the strength of your current bars You're Steve Baldwin, without Big Brother no one would know who the f** you are And they said you're a snake on Big Brother you had to stoop down low The real you is only someone you can know We had 24 hour surveillance on you at home And we still didn't get to see the Truman Show So I know you're feeling not everything is right with the world I know you feel you'll never get the hype that you've earned I actually felt for him, til I saw this guy had the nerve To get into a f**ing bar fight with a girl Pathetic And threatening women and kids on Twitter online is worst This is you getting the f**ed up life you deserve And in the club when you catch a girl's eye and you flirt It might help if you don't Mike Tyson her first Threatening women on Twitter is what is what this guy might tweet Hitting girls in the club with a mai tai knee Throwing out like he didn't have the right ID Check it out everybody it's a pint sized Bleek But he acts like he loves the hate it fuels him, he can't get enough Then went on Big Brother and they booed him and that set him up He went writing his diary in his room and got upset as f** And we saw him crying over the booze like a depressive drunk Now don't get me wrong, I've got nothing against a man that cries until he gets pander-ized We all get kinda sad inside, I've had my times, but on Big Brother?...on Channel 5? ...And it's live? Where's your dignity? You're way too easily antagonized He goes from tough to effeminate it's absurd to see the paradigm In a couple of seconds he goes from Hercules to pantomime So f** the pretending you don't deserve to see my battle rhymes Until you stop being so f**ing pathetic and you can learn to be a man inside But the truth is, I don't even hate you Anton, f** it I don't know how to Cause me hating you would be like me hating on a statue It just makes me look bad and there's no added value On hating you, when i don't know the first thing about you I mean as battlers, we have characters and that could be said to me But he's too far gone he's had his mask on as far back as his memory So his attempt to be a celebrity is all a wa*ker like Anton will ever be And so you should f**ing look at yourself in the mirror And ask if you're happy with that as your legacy AND! If you don't want people to bring up Big Brother in a f**ing battle Then don't go on Big Brother or don't f**ing battle Time!