Don't Flop - Marlo vs Mos Prob lyrics

[Round 1: Marlo] I'll never let Prob get the best of me I'm just glad you managed to pull off that upper cla** pyjama project successfully Once there was a rapper called DNA DNA was one of the cleverest chaps off the head with the raps that was ever established, yeah Grime Time and Smack had feathered his cap, with ledger and pad and pen Now many a man from England wanted to step in to challenge, yet He'd go West of the map and then into Canada, yeah so we had to rest, seemed like only American fans were getting the action Then, DNA battled Eurgh at Vendetta, a mad event Hell of a clash, impressions were had so next he would travel lengths Gets sent to a match and then he came back to bury a hatchet when He literally battled Mos Prob for some reason Well congrats, he'll never be back again Adam D Felman: the 'D' stands for c*nt You can hold your head up high but all I've got is an imposter in my sights like the Rockerfeller guy Seriously, you studied film, worked in a call centre, you like to write comedy when high? I know, Prob is awesome, right? I don't know whether to insult his partial sight or complement the guy Seriously, like stop copying my life Now of course because I was second to check in to Don't Flop and pen a rhyme that I've been copying his life Well fine dude, it'll be like Moon, times two, just a couple of Sam Rockwells in a fight Nah f** that clone sh** You're so weird you would clone sh** Your existence makes a mockery of mine And whoever told you you were a comic, well they lied The parody clown Sanity Valve may have sounded novel at the time But you can't honestly deny that when the concordes took to flight that you weren't in a helicopter made of sh**e My dissertation will sh** on your dissertation My dissertation said your dissertation was boring and basic and called it a racist Said it's mum was a who*e with a facelift Now I'll admit, my style isn't usually freshest But even the way you look screams student/pretentious I mean even your stupid head looks like it's doing a lecture When I first saw you, you with two of your friends just looking super tremendous on my uni prospectus And f** your long conversations trying to hop on my wavelength Constantly saying we should do bad bars cos you've not got the patience to jot proper statements I will not f**ing cave in And if I do, it's only because you're boring to write for Like an uninspiring lock combination I don't give a damn what your real name is Haha, same name, call back humour - time [Round 1: Mos Prob] You dissing my shirt was more than slightly stupid You're just jealous of my gangster-ness because I bothered to bring the iron to it You're [?] to your knees Do a Pedro flip, cause he freestyles rawer than me Quarter to three... You are so sh** People only know him because he's doing the same sh** that Mos did, but post Grist f** you, don't live, your style's got loads of holes in - no sieve You should battle Psychosis in a 'Who's got the worst first name' battle - you'd both win You're going to experience defeat not win Your Hampshire-based mother is a real hot chick Not talking about a folk band on fire when I mention how hot that Fleet Fox is I spit that abusive-full Your group is called, oh, it's Hat right - beautiful I've got more hat flips than a Dick Van Dyke musical The name Hat, well it fits, you should know it best Because if hat was to be taken off you'd have to show respect And if you hide behind Hat why is your stupid hairline showing then? And I'd never be the sort to call you gay and that but live with Shuffle right? I guess home is where you lay your hat (Nothing? Fair enough) I go steaming past this peasant and leave him scars, again I've got a sturdy mind, a steely heart and I can also type really fast Either you're looking at your reflection in a spoon, or your hairline's receding hard You forcing a motif by saying the word 'dude' is almost as awkward as me forcing a motif by saying the word 'dude' What, you think no one else has sat down and locked in the room? You think dead pan irony is something no one else can possibly do? I hope your dissertation's presented sloppily, 'dude' I hope your citations weren't even referenced properly, 'dude' I hope when you're finished renting the property, 'dude' You won't even get the money when the deposit is through And for Don't Flop's posh toff top spot You're the vaguest contender I'll gravely offend you so save your conjecture I finish degrees like yours on the way to a lecture And you record my moves like when you mash up four nice tunes I wonder what else this broad might do Cos I've seen most of the same things in a night that you've seen in one of your nights too... Time [Round 2: Marlo] Every time I see you, you have your f**ing keyboard - it's true Just in case when you're out on the streets performing rap At least you'll always have the option to drop one of your really awesome tracks You're that completely normal guy On a battle card that'll practice bars on a Yamaha at the park You've actually brought it with you today on top of everything else In the megabus' special luggage, on top of everything else You're like a f**ing parent who's been scaring themself silly Convinced that their kid'll be in menacing peril if they let it out of their sight for a second and dwell It's a musical instrument - I'm sure it can fend for itself Your man's overprotective as hell Still, you never can tell It's best to be careful and help I knew a drum kit once which was left by itself Went into the kitchen, grabbed the kettle, it fell on to his head, smacked it open like an egg in a shell It was never itself Next time I see you with that piece of pointless trash We'll see what kind of damage it really ought to stand I'll rip the keyboard off your back Smash open the black notes and pee in all the gaps So when you want to play in a major key the Es are falling flat And eeK gets f**ing mad (because of the key it ought to have) Why the keyboard? Well, he composes scores Made with pure sk** for loads of your favourite short films Wow, your parents must be super proud, man Whenever you do a soundtrack I'd turn the movie sound down, the movie sounds crap His girlfriend's a battler, you know what rhymes with Rapunsell? Crap cuddles How did you get a girlfriend to start battling? What was your method? Did you sit her down, teach her rap and Hip Hop as a lesson Then casually pop her the question? Like 'Jaqueline, you could make me happy and honest I reckon Now tell me what rhymes with hell-of-a-guy and you could rap on Don't Flop in second I'm just imagining Prob re-enacting the plot of inception Like Di Caprio's character, Cobb He magically hops in her head and begins a dramatically complex adventure that's elaborate, long and contentious And he implants the idea deep within her subconscious, now that'd be proper impressive He'd even do the score himself so the soundtrack is an ominous presence And now the battle scene has Adam D and Jaqueline The family rapping team, aww that is sweet One day she'll wake up from the trance and realise you're just a spastic freak How did you get a girlfriend... Time [Round 2: Mos Prob] I'm sorry to let you down This isn't really in my image, it feels a bit like quitting But for the next few rounds I'm not going to win by entertaining, I'm going to win by winning See, I want to test you [?] Try my hardest to hit you You mention your partner because he's sick and writes half of your sh** too You're best friends with Shuffle All the polava you've been through But you can't hardly rest on your laurels when your Hardy is with you You're tall but for all [?] audience applauds [?] raucous [?] He even got endorsed by a The Saurus But I've got [?] support for my rawness [?] It's just awkward you weren't taught a course in endurance So flog a dead horse til it's sore, I'm sure it's fun But I give it four months til they're bored of this Morecambe & More cum Your parents play Monopoly with actual property And have their sushi served rawer than a Unanymous policy People like us should be grateful for a chance to promote our comedy Not talking over opponents, gloating co*kily For f**'s sake show some modesty I don't give a floating toffee sweet for the TV panel show spot you seek This isn't Mock The Week, this is mock the weak And in the novelty stakes you've gained impressive height You said lyrical once, and by Jove you've said it twice But remember guys Even though your fan-base has grown in depth and size The Vengaboys had number one records twice And still never really stood the test of time So if you do get a spot at world domination four I'll pull out my Venga-knife and take a Venga-flight just to shank you in your Venga-eyes You Venga-claat And when you make that inevitable slide to appalling And the audience starts finding you boring I'll be like 'Lo, how the mighty have fallen' Shed one crocodile tear like when I'm listening to the cries of an orphan And one actual tear like the day I had to say goodbye to my foreskin I never cross the line, I've never got enemies My one rule is that I never let this obsessive need to act offensively ever get to me However, your four-year-old sister... ...is the only person that thinks you've got any longevity And she don't even know what the hell it means And I know your ilk and it's plain People like 'Wow, a posh bloke with a sk** - that's insane' But dopeness wasn't built on a stage And Rome wasn't built in a day Time [Round 3: Marlo] Right, question, who voted for this? That's right, nobody did You know what it is The moment it hit Most were on his old school Toshiba loading in clicks Over and over til his mouse broke into bits He ticked the box like fifty odd times Before it exploded the system The forum closed and desisted There wasn't a hope for the kids that wanted me to go against Briggs And don't lie, I know guys, you totally did It's mosh team versus posh team it would have only been sick You had everything written ahead of this fixture Before any ever decision was ever envisioned Is he quite geeky? Yes Why, look at the size of his specs His technical side is the best No, seriously, he might be IT obsessed Christ he connected like nine ethernet Cables underneath his table to his IP address Just to make it absolutely certain we would fight to the d**h Because he was psyched he would get to write me some threats After I beat this peasant in five leagues of chess Yes, you are quite keen to step now Our rivals been keeping you up at night, feeling stressed, like: 'Goshdarnit, who does this Marlo guy think he is? Being all middle cla** and white in this b**h Doing rhymes about recycling bins He sounds kinda like me a bit Minus the lisp I desperately try to hide when I spit' Don't try and deny it you prick So who claimed this is a mirror match? Well that's quite depressing Some facts might contest it but that's my contention I mean, we may both well be well-spoken Gap Yah contenders But I'm better by a damn-sight and you're not a damned sight impressive Plus I can see perfectly, and Dan's sight's regressing I stand by the fact I can out-write and test him If this is a mirror match, watch me catch my reflection We might both be middle cla** but I'm a different sort See, I'm a frigging Lord I will not drink your motherf**ing wine if it is corked Plus it's easier to picture me riding on a horse You spit basic rhymes And only take the prize For most consistent miming Of a walk when you're wobbling from side to side and back and forth So f** you, you c*nt Really, it should be clear this is true You're only ever good in battles for all the weird sh** you do See you're the type to call it time in the middle of a s- Time [Round 3: Mos Prob] I liked your chess scheme, it was actually quite decent But you're an Aryan f**-tard so you only play with the white pieces This is my successor innit Basically just me with a fresher image Who got like six billion views in seven minutes When I'm pushing 35K and stretching limits I mean damn, I'm gunna have to find myself a better gimmick Time to f**ing get submissive This is the [?] mandrils [??] Versus the Pope and The Bangles [??] And you're partly culpable Bagnall 'Cos when I started to build a cult through my battles They won't even film from multiple angles See, I grew up collecting dust Never did the s** as much Stayed in the possessive clutch of a well over-protective mum Bullied by oppressive thugs, so I never had the strength to punch [?] being smarmy and offensive got ladies interested, yum [?] wouldn't have to do test and stuff No prospects so I spent each day in a call centre, depressed as f** Then ended up in a financially dependent rut, [?], doing sketchy stuff for my bestest chum, sound familiar? Damn right, I f**ing bet it does And then he started to battle rap But you're just someone else's sad sequel Don't Flop's where I discovered multis, how to get flips off [?] How to get flipped off and act evil Don't Flop is where you discovered Hip Hop, females and black people I'll humiliate you in public, and then we'll go to the cinema after This isn't a difference between who can spit a bar faster Or give them hard laughter This is a difference between a middle cla** rapper and a middle cla** wrapper I mean, I'm just as middle cla** as you But it's something that I don't try to hard to prove The same guilt that's a part of me is a part of you I feel bad when I see a homeless person and pa** them too And when someone burps I actually say 'Pardon you' But this is genuine rapper - so posh, gla**es, j** versus teribble actor - Don't Flop's Martin Clunes And since it's my demographic that gave Mark his views And they pa** to you, it's the same irony card you abused Except I only used mine on the outside of the mask I used Your whole stance is proved [??] used So at the moment it doesn't Your whole stance is proved to be just a simulation of lines other artists used So, at the moment it doesn't really seem that hard to lose But you don't get to be Dizaster with smarter shoes and a middle cla** martyr too It may make everyone laugh it's true But the side I'm on is of a darker hue It's time to meet your father, Luke So yeah, you're funny, clever with rhymes, incredibly posh And I don't doubt you're better with props But why only wait 'til you step in the spot See these? No you can be me whenever you want