DJ Shadow - Cliff Hanger lyrics

"Whole house freeze!" It was a Thursday. I stepped in the club. There she was Draped in a burgundy dress, silhouetted superbly Curved indeed. She started staring in my direction Luring and urging seductively Body language instructing me I offered her a drink instead she took a cup of tea And then I lied about my luxury lifestyle And I said "So who you be? You looking kind of tight, gal I would love to see you in a nightgown" She said "They call me the Dragon Queen and I come from Tibet I'm calm in the face of pressure and you'll never see me sweat I've come to your country in search of a lost Scroll That contains directions to a hidden village comprised of gold" I looked at her confused and said "But why have you told me this?" She said the description that I fit Was that of the Chosen One who'd go beyond Then slipped a concoction in my drink That immediately set my consciousness adrift... Now I'm in that zone dwelling. I woke in a warehouse tied to a chair With an abundance of flare surrounding me in a circular angle Glared up at the Dragon Queen's Lair, and wasn't imagining a thing Her steps on the stairs had a magic gleam, glowed brightly To prepare me for my journey, a Sword was hovering towards me Plus garlic from the Keepers of the Gate who bore all the secrets and take Care of trespa**ers, but at last it's prophesized that I would gain Access to a cultural dynasty buried and seize and capture the Scroll Ma**ive helicopters patrolled the rooftops, strapped in Began travelling into the darkness, knew not of what awaited I thought of a way to get out of it, just then the bottom gave way I began falling and gave it ten seconds, pulled the cord on my parachute Landed surrounded by a herd of wild barracudas, lions The sounds of the wild kingdom piercing like a siren Was I entering near the mere mortal life span's end? Defiantly I stood boldly as they began closing in And time seemed to be moving rapidly just then... "Whole house freeze!" Just then I pulled the Sword and somehow It affected all the creatures as they stepped back and bowed And the same Glow that I seen in the Sword I seen in the eyes of the Lion Who began leading me in a specific direction as if trying to tell me something Just over the horizon, the same creatures who had been described Appeared in statue form, but their eyes scoped And as I approached the gate they began to break open and cried "AFTER YEARS WE HAVE FINALLY BEEN AWAKENED!" The a**ault was on, I got knocked to the ground by one Shocked in an unorthodox form boxing Throwing an abnormal proportion of body blows, karate chops And drop kicks, plunged struggling deeper into the swamp Then I grabbed my Sword, the garlic put it around my neck Saw that it was draining all of their energy and then with a swing Off with their heads! The gates slowly and mysteriously opened Curiously I moseyed in with intensity focusing on my objective Spider webs the size of king-size beds Fell in a secret pa**age not knowing to where it lead Just then the same Light beamed brightly and in the distance At that instance, lo and behold, The Hidden Scroll! And just as I thought my mission was over I could feel the Dragon Queen breathing heavily over my shoulder She began to transform and metamorphosize She took on an a**ortment of legs, arms, heads and eyes And sprouted two horns and began to breathe fire So once again, I grabbed my trusty Sword, but to my astonishment She burned it to a crisp, turned and grasped the Scroll And exited much faster than the secreted gas. I'm gasping Clasp full of flames cast in my direction I saw my whole life flash and the possibility of d**h And a casket pa**ed into the ground, pound for pound, astounding How could I survive and last another round inside this madness? "Whole house freeze!"