I gotta tell you this, 'cause I always wanted to share This with a crowd This is a story, it's a coming of age tale And it's about the first time I ever got head Come on along with me I'll never forget this, I was 17 years old And I took this girl out on a date, I took her to Papagenoo's. And I got her the spaghetti basket It's delicious And so, at the very end of the date, drove her home And we're sitting in front of her house and it's that Awkward moment, you know, when you wanna kiss but You're still so shy. And you end up talking for 4 and a Half f**ing hours So finally, she leaned in, she was like "Well, anyway I should probably go 'cause it's dusk." And I said, "Yeah, I guess I should go to." We both Leaned in and we *peck noise* kissed. And then out of Nowhere, I didn't even expect it. She went "awww" And so very quickly I ripped off my jeans Like I was in The NBA, and I put my seat back. And she started to Give me the bocoik, you know. It was fantastic and it Felt so good, and suddenly started feeling tingles and Jingles... like I was about to bocoik, you know what I'm saying? The law is we have to tell you. Right ladies? We have To let you know, we want to tell you. but we don't, at The same time. So I wan't to tell her, but I tell the Seatbelt instead...