[Verse 1] Look, Tommy Angelo ain't usually the kind of guy to spill the beans But beneath the glitz and gleam, this business is filled with fiends So I'm switching teams, snitching, sneaking, went my way Then slinking off to witness protection at Empire Bay Never thought I'd be an informer, officer, I ain't your rat But if it's either that or getting kneecapped with a baseball bat Then it's obvious, I got no option but to cough it up So you're gonna hear me singing like a canary at the opera Or a broad who's getting loose as a goose at the speakeasy Jeez, I've seen scenes obscene enough to make queasy See, we kinda like the finer things the violence brings Fine dining and wine to drink, a taxi driver's dream [Verse 2] For beating prohibition, lost heaven needs a coalition You can refuse me any time but you're in no position I hope you're listening, no read between the lines Heed my unspoken wishes, fish are keen to meet my client He'll be feeling fine, he just needs some cleaning time Look, he's just deep-sea diving What the f**k you mean he's dying? So tell the boys they'd be well advised in avoiding Illinois 'Cause we're the type to visit a journalist by whom we're vilified Never mind the crime file, ours was a lavish lifestyle Any violent transaction enacted purely mercantile Honestly, some of these wiseguys are quite vile, it's kinda wild What you can hide behind a nice tie and a polite smile "You're flesh and blood", says Don Salieri, "My child" "Until the time we see you through St. Peter's turnstile" Your life might need the mafia to take it off of you Ey, no need to walk away, we brought a car for you [Verse 3] We're gonna take you for a ride around the block And if you're feeling shy, we'll help you find out how to talk They'll need a team of guys to dry you out the dock They'll find you drowned with a block tied around your socks That's what'll happen when you're diving down with sharks So now your time's arrived to lie in the ground in a box Fertilising flowers till we cut 'em by the stalks Lying in a shallow grave, no rocks to mark the plot Pause for thought, you wanna talk profit and loss? Talk to the boss, I ain't even sure if he works in his office or not But I certainly never heard of him, officer, I'm at a loss As to how the perp could have murdered, purloined And driven off with the profit, it was all part of the plan We'd park the van behind that dark sedan The hired hands would wait for our command And then start to scram Shift shipments of contraband while listening to Sinatra's band If you ain't in this life don't even try to understand You can call our tactics underhanded, I call 'em slick Like after the lancers game, you just happen to call in sick We're all magicians It's just how we perform the trick that's different I can blow holes through vault walls that are four-inch thick [Verse 4] So of course, we're mafioso, you darn bozo No, I don't think so, I friggin' know so The whole neighbourhood we control's a no-go So if you don't hope for a bolt cutter to both toes You better no-show Make yourself a Joe Schmoe, the folk nobody don't know See, this business don't go for slogans and logos, no We keep it on the low-low, no fingerprints or photos Right under your nose We throw you off the scent when we blow smoke Quid pro quo, keep your friends and foes both close Or soon enough you'll be thinking, "Ey, where'd all the dope go?" Stole coke by the boatload in packets labelled "cocoa" Yeah, although we got a sense of humour this is no joke Let me make a toast though to the Most ferocious folks you'd hope to know Cosa nostra, no one's closer, no one's supposed to Now those associates know I broke the code, the oath, omerta I've woken from the dream, the false hope of America