He was my friend, but what the f** I slapped him down cuz it was fun I stole his girl, I knocked her up I had my fun I'm allergic to myself So, she kept the kid, went on the dole I took her checks, I spent it all Went in my lungs and up my nose She loves me so I'm allergic to myself Now the kid's a foul mouthed little brat Just like his dad - a f**ing rat He hates his mom, he thinks I'm great What can I say? I'm allergic to myself It cracks me up, it makes me scratch He's still my friend, she's always back I'm allergic to myself