[Intro: Spoken] It's Christmas Geez, Christmas is terrible [Verse 1: Willam] I'm never, ever, ever, gonna get it together Dad don't give a sh** And my sisters say whatever All good, I'm cool My mom threw the tree off in the inground pool Some about something cause I'm underage drinking It's easy sneaking liquor when they're cooking in the kitchen Woke up, tree side Got the garbage can lid for a ghetto sleigh ride [Pre-Chorus: All] And this could be... (Gingerbread tastes like jäger) The worst Christmas ever (b**h you don't know a sled) [Chorus: All] Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater Don't care what Santa brings won't send him a letter Make a list and check it twice, it won't make it better Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater [Verse 2: Courtney Act, spoken] My entire family's on the morning flight to Paris Night before they punished me and sent me to the attic (Go to your room!) Woke up, rolled out Mum forgot about me on the plane and freaked out (Courtney!) Two guys tried to break into my house but I was smarter Set a bunch of traps, set a guy on fire Yeah I, nearly died Mum had to ask John Candy for a ride [Pre-Chorus 2: Spoken] [Alaska] Wait a second, that sounds really familiar [Courtney] No, no, that's my family Christmas, that's what happened [Alaska] Do they even have Christmas in Australia? [Courtney] No... [Chorus: All] Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater Don't care what Santa brings won't send him a letter Make a list and check it twice, it won't make it better Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater [Bridge: Alaska, Spoken] So, there is this one year And it was Christmas And my brother got karate patches And I really wanted to get karate patches So I thought I was gonna get karate patches And then I didn't get karate patches [Pre-Chorus 3: Courtney] Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater Don't care what Santa brings won't send him a letter [Chorus: All] Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater (your sweater's so ugly) Don't care what Santa brings won't send him a letter Make a list and check it twice, it won't make it better (so ugly) Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater [Outro: All, Spoken] [Alaska] Okay Courtney here's the part where you sing like Mariah Carey, go, go [Courtney] No I'm not doing it this year everybody made fun of me last year, y-you do it [Alaska] Fine I'll do it okay ready [Courtney] Why didn't you tell me you could sing like that? [Willam] Happy Birthday Hanukkah!