College Humor - Wish I had a Portal gun lyrics

Wish I had a Portal Wish I Wish I had a Portal Gun Wish I had a Portal Wish I Wish I had a Portal Gun To be an Aperture Science client Would be like a dream Hey yo my brain has been cravin' it back Since Portal hit steam No commute to work i'd have The portal express With a blue one in my closet Orange one at my desk When my roommate is annoying and been Toying with my stuff I'd shoot a portal underneath him and just Punch him in the nuts I'd order delivery get it Fast like digiorno 'cuz once it leaves the restaurant It goes right through a portal I'm never late for a date Just ask my lady friends By using portal physics I'm always impressing them Forget making reservations I would never have to wait Portal in the right location I've got someone else's plate I could sneak into a party Where they didn't invite me And be dealing out bacardi While some dudes try to fight me Would always end well Dealing with these mere mortals Aperture handhelds Got me thinkin' with portals Wish I had a Portal Wish I Wish I had a Portal Gun I'm not mute like freeman yo But please don't make me beg for one Wish I had a Portal Wish I Wish I had a Portal Gun I'd be cool as chell Oh I could do a speedy grocery run Life gave me lemons I don't make lemonade I'm mad like Cave Johnson I got lemon grenades The world is filled with puzzles I could solve with portal physics I would brave the chamber struggles Just to escape family visits I'd be traveling like a maveric Surfaces all orange and blue When I'm locked out my apartment I'd use the companion cube Oh GLaDOS take me to your center 'cuz I want to get enriched I'm dying thinkin'bout your science I'd do anything for it Yeah, i'd shoot two portals in a vertical line Undo my belt, lean in and Change pants without having to look down Also i'd s** my own diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick YEAH b*tchES SCIENCE now your cumming through portals Wish I had a Portal Wish I Wish I had a Portal Gun Wish I had a Portal Wish I Wish I had a Portal Gun