Cobra Skulls - Dead Inside lyrics

My friends call me up to get me to go out on Friday night But I just felt dead inside, like I had to hide From small talk and boozed-up disapproving socialites So many times I've tried by my brain is fried My friends all try to tell me it's good to be alive But they don't understand That I'm already dead inside I smoke myself stupid and I drink myself to sleep I would step outside but I've admitted all defeat I used to have a thirst for life but now I think I'm cursed And I can't decide when I lost my pride They say these are supposed to be the best years of my life But they don't understand That I'm already dead inside I don't know who I am I'm just a shell of a man And don't bother asking Why am I...?