Cledus T. Judd - Did I Shave My Back For This? (Parody 'Did I Shave My Legs For This?' - Deana Carter) lyrics

A mason jar full of shine A CD of Leann Rhimes Is what I bought for our anniversary tonight Now here I stand with my petunias in hand And you've got a headache again I hit a yard sale cut my toenails Trimmed my nose hairs just right I thought you'd be impressed By my new hunting vest But there's no chance tonight It ain't the first time this year It'll be the TV and beer I about forgot what's its like to be here As I sleep on the floor While she sniffles and snores Did I shave my back for this Oh man Aww woo This things duller than a dag burn bu*ter knife Now I'll bet she'll regret That she didn't let Me take her to that motel with a pool You know its so hard to find Free HBO and Showtime And them vibrating beds sure are cool I souped up my RV Fired up my Flobee Trimmed my toupee just right I tried self tanning cream it turned my skin green Uh you know the directions uh said that it might Well its a mystery to me Why she don't like Cledus T. Most find me hard to resist I'm wearing my brand new drawers And wondering what the heck for Did I shave my back for this Dee-Anna Did I shave my back for this Ohh ohh ohh (Coughs)