Chevy Chase - Season 1 Episode 1: Wolverines lyrics

[ Open to a small room with two men sitting in chairs ] Professor: Let us begin. Repeat after me. [ European Immigrant in tight-mouthed concentration, nods ] Professor: I would like..... European Immigrant: [ in thick accent ] I would like.... Professor: ....to feed your fingertips.... European Immigrant: [ in thick accent] ....to feed yur fingerteeps.... Professor: ...to the wolverines. European Immigrant: [ in thick accent ] ....to de wolver-eenes. Professor: Next, I am afraid.... European Immigrant: [ in thick accent ] I em afred... Professor: ...we are out... European Immigrant: [ in thick accent ] ...we are out... Professor: ...of badgers. European Immigrant: [ in thick accent ] ...of badjurs. Professor: Would you accept... European Immigrant: [ in thick accent ] Would you accept... Professor: ...a wolverine... European Immigrant: [ in thick accent ] ...a wolver-eene... Professor: ...in it's place? European Immigrant: [ in thick accent ] ...een es place. Professor: Next, "Hey," Ned exclaimed... European Immigrant: [ in thick accent ] "Hey," Ned asclaimed... Professor: "let's boil... European Immigrant: [ in thick accent ] "let's boil... Professor: ...the wolverines." European Immigrant: [ in thick accent ] ...the wolver-eenes." Professor: Next... [ The Professor suddenly gasps, clutches his chest, and falls off his chair to the floor, obviously stricken with a heart attack. The Immigrant looks puzzled for a moment, then repeats the Professors gasp, clutches his chest, and throws himself on the floor. ] [ Stage Manager enters the scene, peers at the two lifeless figures and looks into the camera and smiles. ] Stage Manager: Live from New York.. it's Saturday Night!