[Verse 1] I am a product of catholic school ruler beatings Suspensions and foolish cheating If I mention the ascension of Christ in a sentence I'm probably kidding This is a song about confronting my demons And leading them back into undeveloped regions of my brain So the sequences stop repeating On the phone Abuela tells me "dios te bendiga" But I feel like God took back his blessings Ever since the moment I started breathing And seeing the lack of validity surrounding all this mythology fed to me f** it even if I wanted to believe I could never make a false god into my centerpiece When I was an alter boy I saw Father Pat drinking wine out of bottles in the back I saw that f**er Brother Rich get fired for touching little kids during after school cla** And when i heard that Father Conrad died of AIDS in 1990 I started realizing that i couldn't trust my church entirely [Hook] Mother Superior jumped the gun In the name of the Father, the Holy Ghost and the Son I present a toast to the nuns Falling in bad jokes like that one What's black and white and red all over? Hope is all done [Verse 2] God helps those who help themselves God helps those with all the wealth But God never helped me in my God damn life So I gotta get up off the shelf And I gotta do it fast Before the past catches up to me s**ing me back in its trap I always wanted to believe in a beautiful heaven But the history of my religion made it completely irrelevant Shouts to the missionaries Raping the women, enslaving the men Shout out to animals buried Apparently they never got to heaven And a final shout out goes to the popes, and priests and the bishops abusing their power Everybody knows real gangsters rock robes and mitre crowns [Hook] Mother Superior jumped the gun In the name of the Father, the Holy Ghost and the Son I present a toast to the nuns Falling in bad jokes like that one What's black and white and red all over? Hope is all done