Ceeingee - I k**ed Jesus lyrics

[Intro] Jesus Christ: Chris, don't k** me Ceeingee: Ha, tell God that you fancy him Jesus Christ: You will burn in HELL! [Verse 1] I took Jesus, put him in the oven Cooked him for 20 minutes and ate him with a hot cross muffin If Jesus was a dog, I would rip the mutt apart and take out his guts I would only respect him if he was with 20 s*uts Sexy ones, not those ugly looking ones Why did Jesus stop playing hockey? He kept getting nailed to the boards A man is talking to God. "God, how long is a million years?" God answers, "To me, it's about a minute." "God, how much is a million dollars?" "To me, it's a penny." "God, may I have a penny?" "Wait a minute." It's like God is gonna pay ya when it comes to 10000 years In time, God can't even predict a rhyme I slime into a holy mans chest, I'll confess my life's sins to the best Look at the mess, I'm beginning to act like a f**in' damn a**, ya** Mary is in bed with Jesus, she's shouting "OH JESUS, OH MY JESUS!" Cent has the magic stick and Jesus has the holy stick One way to talk about or mention a biblical dick [Hook] Guess what, I k**ed Jesus Guess what, I k**ed Jesus Guess what, I k**ed Jesus [Verse 2] I grab Mary and f** her til God strikes me down Put my dick in her, take her and finish her Put her in my car til it crashes I'm peeing on a priest in the ma**es I'm doing sh** that is so damn f**ed up, I'm pissing in the holy grail cup I'm putting an hex on damn chicks k** every Jesus freak, the peak of a bird is blue when I k** it Have a bird for dinner, I'mma be a winner f** this, sh** is getting thinner and damn good so I'll be a ringer Pick yer ring for a good time to sing like f** it, I'm in a truck I might kick the f**in' bucket I'm on it, I'll be sh**ting on a bible til it smells like sh** Wait it already does cause it is sh** It's more sh** than my face, I ain't ugly but my bu*t is I think I might take a piss, on a nun til she is gone I will make her drink it, a golden shower Check the hour cause I want a power to scour priests in showers I'm kickin' down a sh** man, I could be a hitman Trying to make a hit-list with a bit for the best k** in the century [Hook] Guess what, I k**ed Jesus Guess what, I k**ed Jesus Guess what, I k**ed Jesus [Verse 3] My stomach is rumblin' I now have the spirits comin' within I'm starting to go crazy like Maisie and little Daisy I start to go madder than a sad man with an infected bladder I'm starting to go badder than anything like wanting to be Scottish king Sitting down, I'm in Scotland wa*king I'm s**ing with a hoe that is drunk, drugged her too She's now doped up, I'mma f** this b**h while she has no cope, yup I'm not a nice boy, hail to the pope yup I'm starting to crazy, hey b**h I'm turning madder than a mad man in a car with a stroke going to a bar Getting pissed, yep He's in the car, gonna crash His head is bashed, his arm slashed by a knife Some dude is cutting him bad than a pin going through your brain I'm in a train, it's going faster than a airplane and I'm gonna die I'm in pain from a b**h stabbin' me right in the artery I'm screamin', she's taking my guts out without me known Now I'm gutless, she's hurting me badder than the bu*t does, or bu*t is I'm trying to run, she's grabbin' me right back to the seat to k** me more [Hook] Guess what, I k**ed Jesus Guess what, I k**ed Jesus Guess what, I k**ed Jesus