Carter The Unstoppable Sex Machine - Cheer Up, It Might Never Happen lyrics

Cheer up, it might never happen Drive by shootings on the streets of Clapham Jackboots booting right across the map And daddy's gone 'a looting with his pistol packin' mama And God didn't make the little green apples With the Halloween grin and the shaving tackle Another worrying thing for the grans to grapple As the earth quakes, shakes and rolls and rattles on And if the whole world is a stage A kaleidoscope of lights and sound You can take my Equity card away And burn the theatre to the ground Cheer up, it might never happen kid Although I think it probably just did The Christmas speech was a p**no vid A topless picture on the British quid Jack and Jill went off the cliff Contract k**ed in a lovers' tiff While Ben and Bill smoke a comic spliff Tom and Jerry built to a moronic riff And if the whole world is a stage A kaleidoscope of lights and sound You can take my Equity card away And burn the theatre to the ground Sack the actors send the clowns Back to practice paper rounds Sweeping leaves and walking dogs Daily deeds and bob a jobs Sitting babies, salting snow Helping ladies cross the road Washing cars, recycling tins Catching falling stars and things Helping old folk, corner shop Little things that mean a lot A fairytale-like end to violence Through jumble sales and sponsored silence Stop the world I wanna get back on I want to learn to love the bomo And have it tattooed across my gut The immortal words cheer up It might never happen to you kid Although I think it probably just did